A Couple's Rebirth to 1977 Before Marriage

Chapter 201: Chapter 198: The Showdown (Part 2)

Gently lifting Zhou Lian’s head, Li Xiu looked at her tenderly, his eyes overflowing with adoration. His voice was as soft as water as he said, "In our last life, the moment you closed your eyes, I felt both resentment and hatred. I resented you for leaving just like that, and I hated that I wasn’t reflected in your eyes. But as I held your cold body, all I could think was how many years it had been since I’d been able to hold you. You were finally quiet in my arms again. My thoughts trailed off, and I lost consciousness. When I opened my eyes again, I was in this life."

"Do you really not resent or hate me?"

"Then... does my Bao’er still resent and hate me?" Instead of answering her, Li Xiu asked softly, his heart strung tight, afraid of hearing an answer he didn’t want.

Glancing at him, Zhou Lian said softly, "I suppose I did resent and hate you at first. I was young back then. After we had our son, the hatred slowly faded. And later, after I left with our daughter, the resentment gradually disappeared too. Looking at you felt like looking at a familiar stranger."

Letting out a soft sigh of relief, Li Xiu asked nervously, "Bao’er, you only married me in this life for the sake of the children, didn’t you?"

"Yes. When I first came back, the future was a complete blur. I didn’t know why I was even alive. The thought of our two children was the only thing that kept me going. Marrying you again was the only way I could possibly see them again."

"Weren’t you afraid this life would be different from the last one? What if it was!" Li Xiu muttered under his breath. He knew this would be the answer.

"Of course I was afraid. That’s why I didn’t dare do anything differently. I cautiously tried to live my life exactly as I had in our last one."

"I was scared, too. I just wanted to see you, even for a moment, but I didn’t dare. I was afraid that if I did anything, things would change. I forced myself to endure two whole months. When I saw you on the day of our blind date, it was a good thing you kept your head down, otherwise you would have sensed something was wrong. Back then, all I wanted was to hold you properly like this, to breathe you in, but I knew it wasn’t realistic. Bao’er, do you know? Seeing you standing there, so lovely... I felt like I was in heaven!" Holding the woman in his arms tightly, Li Xiu softly recounted his overwhelming emotions from that day.

"It feels like a dream. After we got married, there were several times I noticed something was off about you, but you always managed to brush it off. If you hadn’t had such a complete breakdown this time, I suppose you were planning to hide this from me for the rest of your life, weren’t you!" Zhou Lian gently rubbed her brow, her heart a whirlwind of emotions. She didn’t know why such a strange fate had befallen them, nor did she quite know how to face Li Xiu—the man she had resented for half a lifetime, and hated for just as long.

"Bao’er, I don’t know either, really. At the beginning, there was no way I could let you know. I only had one thought back then: if anyone dared to stop me from marrying you, I’d kill gods if they stood in my way and slay buddhas if they blocked my path. That included myself!" Li Xiu said in a low voice. ’How could I have let her know back then? What if she refused to marry me!’

Zhou Lian looked at him, somewhat speechless. ’This man really will say anything.’ She had to admit, upon reflection, that he was right. When Li Xiu was determined to marry her, he couldn’t possibly have told her the truth. Her mental state was incredibly unstable back then; if she had known, she might really have destroyed their chance at marriage. Her evaluation of Li Xiu at the time was simply "foolishly obedient to his parents" and "quick-tempered." She had been blind to anything else.

"Bao’er, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for slapping you in our last life!" Li Xiu looked at Zhou Lian gently. As he spoke, he took her hand and slapped himself hard across the face. Before Zhou Lian could even react, he used the back of her hand to slap himself again.

The crisp sound of the slaps, followed by the blood that slowly trickled from the corner of Li Xiu’s mouth, snapped the stunned Zhou Lian back to her senses. She quickly grabbed his hand and cried out, her voice cracking, "What are you doing? Jin Chen, are you insane?"

"Bao’er, do you know? Ever since our last life, I’ve wanted to chop off the hand that slapped you. It was like I was possessed back then. I heard you say that when we were being matched, you hadn’t taken a liking to me at all. Then I remembered my mother and Li Xin saying you didn’t like me one bit, that you only married me because you couldn’t defy your father’s decision. The moment I slapped you, I regretted it. Bao’er, it’s true. I regretted it instantly. Seeing the shock in your eyes, I was terrified. But after that, we just drifted further and further apart, and you never forgave me." Li Xiu softly spoke of his regret and his self-loathing.

"Are you saying you came home to fight with me because your mother and Li Xin told you I didn’t like you?" Zhou Lian looked at Li Xiu and asked softly. In their last life, that incident had been a taboo subject for her. Whenever Li Xiu tried to bring it up, she would get annoyed and refuse to listen. Eventually, he stopped mentioning it. She truly had no idea his mother and sister were involved.

Li Xiu nodded. What his mother and Li Xin had said went far beyond just "not liking him"—they’d said much nastier things. Otherwise, how could he have lost control and slapped her? But no matter the reason, he was the one who had struck the blow. It was all his fault, and he wouldn’t make excuses for himself.

"That’s really something. Can your mother and sister really not stand to see you happy? Even if I didn’t truly like you back then, I was already married to you and we had a daughter. I would never have been unfaithful," Zhou Lian said with a sense of helplessness.

"Bao’er, Bao’er... so you did like me back then. You did like me, right?" Li Xiu looked at Zhou Lian in pleasant surprise, stammering slightly.

Zhou Lian looked at him, feeling a bit helpless. ’Is that really the point here? What is this man thinking? Why is his train of thought never on the same track as mine?’

"Is that the point? Jin Chen, I’m talking about your mother and sister!"

"Who cares about them? Bao’er, you’re saying you liked me back then too, right?"

Seeing Li Xiu’s nervous and expectant expression, Zhou Lian felt a pang of heartache. ’Does he really care about this so much? Does he care about *me* so much?’ She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment before speaking. "When we were first set up, I really didn’t like you. Think about it—you were dark, skinny, and short. You had a sick father to support and a gaggle of younger siblings below you. But later, my father told me you were filial, honest, and capable, so I thought you must be a good person. After I married you, even though we lived a simple life, you know I never cared about that sort of thing. You were very good to me. Even after our daughter was born, you were still very good to me. I was starting to like you then, but it wasn’t long before... the incident happened. To be honest, I do like you very much now, and I love you, but I still don’t understand your feelings for me. How could they be so deep? So deep that you would follow me even in death!"

Overjoyed, he kissed her again and again, then looked at her tenderly and said, "I don’t know either. In our last life, I was stupid enough to lose you. All I know is that I care about you. I care so much. One time, you got hit by a car while you were out buying something for our little grandson. At that moment, I felt my world turn to ash. I stumbled all the way to the hospital, and when I found out you were okay, it still took me half the day to recover. That’s when I knew I couldn’t live without you. Even if you didn’t care about me, you were still my wife. I could still see you, and that was enough. But then... you just left me all alone. I honestly felt like I could have destroyed the world then. When I woke up again in this life, I knew you were my beautiful doom. When it comes to you, I will never let go, not even in death!"

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