I was reminded of what Thaxted told me earlier. Supposedly, each Title had a quest associated with it. I navigated to the quest log to once again be met with the command to kill a monster for the Hero questline. It was strange that I still had the Hero quest despite no longer having the title. I wondered if it was some error in the System.
I wasn’t too concerned about it. I wasn’t planning on ever completing that quest so instead I read the two other new questlines that had appeared.
[Villain Questline]
[Kill your first human.]
[Lockpicker Questline]
[Use your picking skills to aid someone who has lost the key to a lock.]
Seeing the Villain quest made me shudder. I definitely didn’t have any plans on completing that. What was it with this System and killing? Why couldn’t the System give me XP for beating someone at darts?
It was like this entire world was built to compel people towards injustice.
I studied the Lockpicker quest next. This one didn’t seem too hard. It did come with a slight flag. People generally didn’t want others to see the things they lock away. Maybe I could find someone who misplaced the key to their front door. That didn’t seem likely to work. They certainly had locksmiths here in this world. People would purchase the help of a professional over someone who looks like a child.
Perhaps I could steal a key from someone and then pick their lock afterwards. To think in such a manner, my mind was becoming warped by this world. I didn’t want to steal, not the least bit because I would be executed for committing further crimes.
Oh wait, I could just ask the others. My Earthly comrades would give me a helping hand.
But first things first, I had to play the slots. I opened the levelling menu and a beautiful machine popped up in front of me. “I’m back, darling.” I caressed its underside. “Did you miss me?” I crawled my fingers up the lever, flirtatiously.
The machine was calling to me. It was begging me to play it. How was I supposed to resist such a powerful display of seduction?
“My mind is telling me to learn more about levelling from the others before using you.” My fingertips reached the top of the lever. “But my body is telling me to play you all night long, baby.” I started rubbing the orb at the top of the lever.
I heard the door click open and Loftus walked in. He caught me French kissing the coin insertion hole of the slot machine.
“Ah! I’m sorry, I should’ve knocked.” Loftus’ cheeks heated up.
I cleared my throat. “Ahem. No problem. I wasn’t doing something indecent or anything like that. You see I was simply curious why there was a deposit here for coins when it doesn’t require any to play.”
Loftus seemed incredulous. “And so, you were using your tongue for what exactly?”
“To inspect the machine of course. What are you trying to imply with that question, you pervert? I am a pure man.” I dispelled the machine. I should’ve been happy that he saw me with the slots, rather than seeing my red System.
Loftus was still weirded out after my explanation. “Anyway, I came in to tell you that we’re going off with Hyde in like fifteen minutes.”
“Hah. Thanks for the invite but I’m too busy.”
“She said she’d kill you if you didn’t come with us.”
“What I meant is that I would be more than happy to join you.”
Loftus smirked. “Sure thing.”
“While you’re here, can you help me out a smidge?”
“What’s troubling you?” Loftus leaned against the doorframe.
“Have you ever lost XP?”
He raised his eyebrows. “Yeah, tons of times. I’ve mainly lost it from stealing. Once I lost like 27 XP for tricking an old woman into thinking I was her dead grandchild. I got a gold ring from her, so I’d say the loss was worth it.”
I blinked at him. “That is so messed up, man. What is wrong with you?” I rolled my eyes. “I don’t even know why I ask that question anymore. You’re all so evil. Were you like this on Earth too?”
“Of course not. We can get away with it here. Just don’t cross the line and the guards wont mess with you because we’re considered heroes.”
“Robbing a senile grandma isn’t crossing the line?”
“You don’t lose that much XP compared with how much you get from killing monsters, so you don’t need to worry about it.”
“What happens if you lose so much XP that you go down in levels?”
“One of us tested it out last night as a goof. The guy had just levelled-up so he knew he could easily level-down by just losing a little XP. He went to the slums to kick the homeless and he managed to reduce his XP past the threshold. Turns out, nothing happens. You just go down a level.”
I tried my hardest to gloss over the cruelty I heard. “Is there somewhere that I can look up information like this?”
“You could try the library or ask the people that live in this world. To be honest, you should come to the nightly meetings. Every night, a bunch of us discuss useful things that we learn.”
“I think I will.”
“I’m glad to see that you’re taking more of an interest in the System, Yarm.”
“I do have to thank the System for helping me free all those slaves. If I get a better grasp of it, I can help more people.”
Loftus frowned when hearing me say that. “You know, you don’t have to play the nice guy. Be more selfish. Focus on your own happiness. If you live for others all the time, you won’t have a chance to live your own life.”
“Drop it, Loftus. I think that we are too far apart to understand each other.” That was putting it mildly. I genuinely could not fathom what went on in his mind, nor the minds of the other Earthlings.
“I just hate to see you waste an opportunity like this.” Loftus clicked his tongue. “Suit yourself.”
“Moving on, can you help me with my quest? I need to pick a lock that you lost the key to.”
“You got a lockpicking title or something? Sure, I’ll help. Trouble is the only key I have is the one to my room.”
“That’ll do fine. Just give it to me and I’ll hide it. That way you’ve technically lost it. Then I unlock the door to your room and presto!”
Loftus seemed doubtful that such a method would work but agreed, nonetheless. I took his key, hid it, and then fiddled with the lock on his door. Some surrounding observers watched me curiously as I opened the door.
[Quest Completed]
[-53 XP]
I saw the System notifying me of my success. I didn’t think it would be that easy, but to be fair it was only the first quest in a series.
“Did you complete it? What reward did you get?” asked Loftus.
I was about to open the System to find out, but then I slapped myself in the face for being so stupid. I couldn’t open my System in front of him. “I’ll check the reward later.”
“Aww, c’mon. We have time. Show me,” Loftus pleaded in an eager tone.
“No. I can’t. I’m too embarrassed, ok?” My voice raised and more bystanders came to see what the commotion was about.
“Don’t be so shy. I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.” Loftus shook me gently.
“No, I can’t. If you see it, I’ll never be able to live it down.” I heard the crowd whispering loudly.
“I really want to see it, though. I promise I won’t do anything weird when you show me. I’m too curious about what it looks like.”
“It looks completely normal and average, ok? There’s nothing abnormal about it at all.”
To my left I saw a girl covering her face with her hands but looking my way through her fingers. “How indecent… I can’t believe he’s going to reveal such a private thing out here in the open.”
The System was considered private? That couldn’t be true. I had seen many people flaunting their statuses to their friends. There didn’t seem to be any shame about revealing it.
Selsie looked my way, blushing heavily. “I didn’t realise Loftus was the seme…”
What the heck was a seme?
Thaxted joined in on the conversation. “You guys wanna see mine? It’s like an elephant trunk!”
How could a System look like an— Oh… The realisation hit me like an elephant trunk. “The lot of you are dirty-minded sickos!” I retreated to my room. The misunderstanding was an effective way to get out of that situation.
I locked the door and opened the System.
[Quest Completed]
[Choose your prize. (Reduced reward due to scheming.)]
[Item: Soundless Pick] [Item: Deafening Pick] [Skill: Hit the Griddy]
My reward was reduced? I wasn’t warned about this. This stupid System had to be making stuff up as it went along. I guess I did kinda cheat to complete the quest, but how was I supposed to know I’d get penalised for it? I wondered if the others knew about this. They probably did. I believed they were all taught important details like this by the royal knights. Yesterday, Loftus was telling me the condensed version. I wish now that I listened to his full explanation.
I clicked each reward to get the juicy details I craved.
[Soundless Pick]
[A lockpick that makes no sound.]
[Deafening Pick]
[A lockpick that is so noisy that it rivals a whale’s calls.]
[Hit the Griddy]
[Expertly perform the Griddy. Costs 21 MP. (Body)]
I considered screaming into my pillow. These options were atrocious. Firstly, a lockpick was already quiet enough. It didn’t need to be soundless. If I took the second item, my eardrums would be blown out the moment I tried to use it. And I didn’t even know what the third option was. Honestly, I wanted to take the third option. The sole reason being that I thought skills would be more useful than items. But it would be dumb to get a skill that I couldn’t even use due to my insufficient XP.
I decided to choose the first option. The next quest in line would obviously be one in which I had to pick locks, so I chose the reward that would be best suited for that. I confirmed my selection and a small lockpick appeared in my hand. It was well-made for certain, but it was just a lockpick. Not much different than ones I could buy at the market.
I navigated to the quest log and read the new Lockpicker quest.
[Lockpicker Questline]
[Unlock the door to someone’s heart.]
“What?” I could not believe my eyes. What was this corny-ass line? How the hell was I supposed to do that? What part of that quest related to lockpicking? Enraged, I threw the lockpick in my hand to the ground. It made no sound.
This System was stupid. Was mine the only one like this? I supposed not because Thaxted did mention having to crack open a dragon egg. That sounded just as bad as this quest.
What did it even mean by unlocking someone’s heart? Was I supposed to make someone fall in love with me? Fat chance of that happening. I seemed to be fairly good at making people hate me, though. Maybe that would complete the quest?
I remembered the meagre amount of XP I got for completing the quest and suddenly was filled with apathy. There was no point in me doing these quests when I could get far more XP by freeing slaves. Or I suppose I meant lose XP.
Although, Hyde would crucify me if I did free another slave. I was at an impasse. I needed more levels to attain the power to free more slaves, but I needed to free more slaves to get more levels.
I supposed I could lose more XP by tricking a grandma into giving me her inheritance, like Loftus. I picked up the Soundless Pick and put it into my pocket. I decided I needed more information about this world. If March the half-raccoon didn’t help me, then I never would’ve freed those slaves in the first place. I had to learn more. Ignorance was my greatest enemy.
“I’m killing that brat! I swear I’m killing that brat!” I heard crashing and thrashing sounds coming from the main hall. “Where is he?”
Loud footsteps came towards my room. Loftus began banging on my door. “Yarm, what are you doing? You’re late. Hyde’s going to kill you if you don’t come, remember?”
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