Yu Qingtang stared in shock. He raised the drawing, dodging Ye Chenyan’s attempt to snatch it away, then held it beside his own face for the other two to see.
“Does it look like me?”
Scholar Xiao opened his mouth. “Well...”
“Um...” Chi Yantian scratched his head. “At least he got both eyes and the mouth in there.”
“But how can you even tell it’s him?”
Ye Chenyan’s face turned bright red. “W-Who said I drew him?!”
The Sage’s Book said, “Guiyi Sect. Whatever Peak. Tianji Zi.”
Ye Chenyan: “...”
He gritted his teeth. “I knew it. That rotten idea had to have been partly his!”
Yu Qingtang studied the pitch-black drawing for a while, then carefully folded it up and tucked it into his storage ring.
Ye Chenyan froze, his gaze darting away. “W-Why are you keeping it?”
“Hehe.” Yu Qingtang’s eyes curved with amusement. “I’ll have you draw another one sometime and see if you’ve improved since back then.”
Ye Chenyan looked as though he wanted to smile, but forcibly pressed down the corners of his mouth and muttered, “I’m not drawing one. I can’t draw. I’d only make you look ugly.”
“Speaking of which, Senior Tianji Zi came here?” Yu Qingtang looked curiously at the Sage’s Book. “Why won’t you let us out? This punishment doesn’t seem all that bad...”
The Sage’s Book rustled through its pages again, and a slip of paper floated into Ye Chenyan’s hand.
“The drawing was his punishment,” the Sage’s Book said calmly. “This is yours.”
Yu Qingtang’s heart lurched with foreboding. He hurried over to see what Ye Chenyan had received.
It was a sheet of paper covered with a row of round, childish characters.
Ye Chenyan blinked, then read aloud with a strange expression, “This is a letter of self-criticism.”
“Master, I was wrong. I know that as a cultivator, I shouldn’t have gotten into a fight with a mortal...”
“Ahhh—!” Yu Qingtang paled in horror and frantically slapped a hand over his mouth. “Where did you people even dig this thing up?! Why are you exposing my embarrassing past too?!”
“Shut up! You’re not allowed to read it! Close your eyes too! No looking!”
Ye Chenyan’s eyes curved with laughter. Holding the letter high enough that Yu Qingtang couldn’t reach it, he rapidly scanned down the page.
Chi Yantian’s interest was piqued as well. “You actually fought a mortal? I never would’ve guessed!”
“Ah.” Scholar Xiao gently waved his folding fan, smiling. “Brother Yu hardly seems like the sort of cultivator who would bully mortals. Surely he had his reasons...”
He leaned over beside Ye Chenyan to read along.
“Let me see what the reason was.”
“Me too!” Not to be left out, Chi Yantian used his height to peer curiously over at the self-criticism letter. “Your handwriting really has been ugly since childhood.”
The Sage’s Book said, “Indeed.”
Yu Qingtang: “...Do any of you have manners?!”
Knowing full well he couldn’t wrestle the letter away from them, he turned his back, squatted down, and covered his ears, pretending he couldn’t hear.
Ye Chenyan was already reading with a grin.
“But I didn’t use spiritual power! We qin cultivators are frail and delicate, and that little fatty weighed at least two hundred pounds! He was like one of the wild boars behind the mountain!”
“He harassed Eldest Senior Sister and said she had no future staying in Biehe Sect, so she might as well go with him and become his concubine! He didn’t even offer to make Eldest Senior Sister his proper wife. He opened his mouth and went straight to concubine!”
“A spoiled rich brat like that has to be beaten now. If I wait until he grows to four hundred pounds, I won’t be able to beat him even with a little spiritual power!”
Scholar Xiao smiled approvingly. “Brother Yu may have been young when he wrote this, but you already knew how to write ‘spoiled rich brat.’ Quite impressive.”
Yu Qingtang did not turn around. “Thank you so much!”
Ye Chenyan continued down the page, then his expression grew strange.
“Although I already can’t beat him now...”
His voice abruptly shot upward.
“He hit you?”
“Huh?” Chi Yantian looked utterly incredulous. “You really lost to a mortal?”
Yu Qingtang’s face went scarlet. “He weighed two hundred pounds! I was a tiny bean sprout back then! What difference is there between a Qi Refinement qin cultivator and a mortal anyway?! It’s not like I could swing a first-rank spiritual artifact at him! What if I killed him?!”
“Why didn’t you ever tell me?!” Ye Chenyan muttered. “I could’ve at least beaten him up a little...”
“No need for that.” Yu Qingtang knew there was no escaping now, so he resigned himself to reality and came back over, pointing at the letter. “Keep reading. I outsmarted him later!”
Ye Chenyan raised an eyebrow and continued.
“But I didn’t disgrace Biehe Sect. I beat him with my wits. I secretly lured him to Shanyuan Peak and let the wild boars behind the mountain teach him a lesson.”
“But I didn’t expect someone that big to get knocked into bed for three days from one boar charge.”
“Maybe the boar was a little heavy-handed, but I didn’t order it to do anything. I’m not even that close with the boars. They charge at me too whenever they see me...”
Chi Yantian clicked his tongue. “Couldn’t beat the mortal fatty, couldn’t beat the boars either?”
Yu Qingtang looked aggrieved. “...Why are you picking on me? I’ve always been weak! It’s not like you only met me yesterday!”
“Ahem.” Ye Chenyan suppressed his laughter and kept reading. “I know I was wrong too. Boars don’t know their own strength, so I shouldn’t let them charge at people in the future.”
“The little fatty may have a foul mouth and the makings of a hooligan, but he hadn’t actually done anything yet, so I couldn’t beat him in advance. I should therefore go apologize to him.”
Ye Chenyan narrowed his eyes.
“But when I went to see him, he said that in the future, Eldest Senior Sister and I could both enter his household and become his male and female concubines...”
He slowly turned his head.
“Is he still alive?”
“He should be.” Yu Qingtang tilted his head. “I never heard that he died.”
Ye Chenyan gave a cold laugh. “Sounds about time he did.”
“Hey, hey, hey!” Yu Qingtang hurriedly grabbed him. “Keep reading! Don’t get worked up!”
Ye Chenyan kept a dark expression while Scholar Xiao took over.
“Then Eldest Senior Sister overheard him, grabbed her guzheng, stormed into his house, and beat the little fatty so badly he couldn’t get out of bed for a month. Afterward, he swore that from then on he would uphold the principle of ‘one life, one love’ and never dare set his sights on either her or me again.”
Ye Chenyan’s expression eased slightly.
“Eldest Senior Sister is a true heroine.”
Scholar Xiao smiled and continued reading.
“I know Eldest Senior Sister is already a Nascent Soul cultivator, so beating up a mortal fatty was really rather inappropriate. But there were extenuating circumstances, and she didn’t hit him hard enough to kill him.”
“And judging by the result, we stopped him from heading down the wrong path and prevented him from growing into a local tyrant who bullied men and women around the foot of our mountain. That ought to count as a good deed too.”
“So please forgive Eldest Senior Sister and let her eat... I know a Nascent Soul cultivator won’t starve to death, but you know what she’s like. She’ll literally die of cravings!”
“I’ll just sneak her half a steamed bun. I promise there won’t be any filling at all. Just half a plain white bun to satisfy her cravings. Please?”
“Best, fairest, softest-hearted Master in the entire world, if I don’t receive a reply within half an hour, I’m going ahead with it.”
When the three of them finished, they all turned toward Yu Qingtang.
Yu Qingtang rubbed his nose guiltily, though there was also a hint of pride on his face.
“I slipped that letter through the crack under his door while he was meditating. Half an hour? He might not even have noticed it by then.”
“By the time he did, Eldest Senior Sister would’ve finished the half bun ages ago! Once it was already in her stomach, he probably wouldn’t have been able to get very angry after reading the letter. He’d definitely just turn a blind eye and pretend he never knew!”
“Smart, right?”
Ye Chenyan smiled without quite smiling. “So you’ve been an expert at acting cute and sweet-talking people since you were little...”
Chi Yantian sighed with feeling. “So there really are cultivators who can’t beat either a little fatty or a wild boar.”
Scholar Xiao’s eyes curved with laughter. “And Brother Yu was already so beautiful as a child that people were coveting him even then.”
“Ahem.” Ye Chenyan cleared his throat. “When we went to Jinzhou, how come I never heard you mention this little fatty? Did he turn into a decent person afterward? Did he actually uphold his ‘one life, one love’ principle?”
“If he didn’t...”
His eyes narrowed, his expression turning unfriendly. His fists looked distinctly itchy.
“No idea.” Yu Qingtang scratched his head. “Master said that once I reached Golden Core, he wouldn’t let me play with the children from below the mountain anymore.”
“He said cultivators and mortals have lifespans that are far too different. If we became too close, it would only bring unnecessary grief later.”
Yu Qingtang sighed softly, a trace of nostalgia appearing on his face.
“I wonder if that little fatty behaved himself afterward.”
Ye Chenyan chuckled. “When I went to Biehe Sect with you before, all I knew was that you had a hard childhood. I didn’t realize it was so interesting too.”
He carefully unfolded the self-criticism letter.
“No wonder your senior brothers and sisters had such a hard time letting you go when you left...”
His gaze flickered.
“If... if you’d been my junior brother, I would’ve made sure that little fatty couldn’t get out of bed for at least half a year.”
Yu Qingtang corrected him. “If we’d been in the same sect, I’d have been your senior brother.”
“So what if you were?” Ye Chenyan raised an eyebrow. “I’d protect my senior brother too. Am I not allowed?”
Yu Qingtang tilted his head.
“I guess you are.”
Ye Chenyan chuckled, then looked toward the Sage’s Book. “Did that old man get this one too?”
The Sage’s Book sounded puzzled. “That old man?”
“Tianji Zi,” Ye Chenyan muttered. “He even went to Biehe Sect?”
“Yes.” The Sage’s Book gave a slight nod. “He said he was still preserving some face for the two of you this time. If you remain determined to leave, there are even more embarrassing things waiting afterward. He recommends that you consider whether you can afford that humiliation.”
Ye Chenyan: “...Ahem.”
His gaze wavered. He sneaked a glance at Yu Qingtang.
Yu Qingtang immediately grew wary. “What?”
“He’s definitely aiming at me.” Ye Chenyan lowered his voice, sounding as though he were discussing the matter seriously with him. “He probably only wants to keep me trapped in here. You should still be able to go outside.”
“So... why don’t you try the exam again?”
Yu Qingtang slowly turned his head toward him.
Ye Chenyan looked utterly sincere. “If you pass, you can go outside with Brother Chi and Brother Xiao and eat all sorts of good food.”
“I don’t mind waiting for you in here. Just like back in Nanzhou—as long as you remember to bring me some food when you come back, I can behave myself and cultivate while I wait for you...”
Yu Qingtang reached over and pinched his cheek.
“I understand now.”
Ye Chenyan blinked innocently.
“You little brat.” Yu Qingtang pinched his face again. “You want to dig up more of my embarrassing past, don’t you? You think I haven’t humiliated myself enough already?”
“No—” Ye Chenyan guiltily turned his gaze away. “Why would I?”
“Why don’t you take the exam again?” Yu Qingtang narrowed his eyes at him. “I think you can afford another attempt. That drawing wasn’t even that embarrassing.”
“No.” Ye Chenyan refused immediately. “I-I’m not sure whether I did anything stupid back then.”
Chi Yantian looked between them. “Then how about the two of us go eat and bring food back for you?”
“You should at least be able to eat one meal.”
“Brother Chi.” Scholar Xiao chuckled and shook his head, pulling him toward the exit. “What matters right now is hardly what we’re eating.”
He waved his folding fan with a smile.
“Senior Tianji Zi’s move is quite ingenious. He did the exact opposite of what one would expect, and now they’re no longer thinking about forcing their way out.”
Scholar Xiao nodded lightly.
“An expert.”
Chi Yantian scratched his head. “Then why exactly are they being kept in there?”
Scholar Xiao shrugged.
“Who knows?”
“We’ll see.”
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