Ye Chenyan’s eyes widened slightly. “How am I supposed to threaten it?”
Yu Qingtang beckoned him over and adjusted his stance, positioning the spear so its point faced the Dragon-Crane Zither. “Like that. Hold the pose. Leave the rest to me.”
Ye Chenyan obediently raised the spear and maintained the position Yu Qingtang had arranged for him.
“Brother Zither.” Yu Qingtang ran his fingers over the instrument’s body and put on a mild smile. “Do you see that spear?”
He lowered his voice in warning. “An ancient demonic weapon. Very vicious.”
The zither’s radiance remained completely subdued. It did not flicker once, choosing to play dead.
Yu Qingtang patted it gently and spoke with great earnestness. “Give up resisting. It’s useless. Do you really think I don’t know whether you can understand me?”
He patted his own chest, then the head of the zither. “Sincerity for sincerity. I respect the temperament of every divine weapon. I only have one tiny request.”
“I don’t need you to give it your all every time. Most days, I only use you to stun fish and things like that. There’s no need to display the power of a first-rank spiritual artifact.”
He raised one finger. “But in a life-or-death crisis, you need to cooperate. You can’t let some little dress blind you—though you don’t have eyes.”
The Dragon-Crane Zither remained completely motionless, as though it were an ordinary object with no spirit whatsoever.
Yu Qingtang waited.
When it still showed no reaction, he heaved a long sigh. “Since you would rather shatter as jade than remain whole as common clay, then I suppose we can only...”
He turned toward Ye Chenyan, narrowed his eyes into a vicious expression, and drew a finger across his throat.
“Negotiations have broken down. Do it!”
Ye Chenyan cooperatively stepped forward. “Do what?”
Yu Qingtang extended one finger and pointed mercilessly downward. “Poke two holes in it.”
“Oh.” Ye Chenyan truly did dare agree. He raised the spear and prepared to stab.
The Dragon-Crane Zither finally reacted. Its light flashed frantically as it trembled with all its strength, nearly breaking free of Yu Qingtang’s arms and fleeing into the sky.
Yu Qingtang hugged it tightly and jabbed a finger at it in warning. “Do you agree or not?”
“Flash twice if you agree! Flash more than that and he’ll stab you! Above the character for lust hangs a—spear! Think carefully!”
The Dragon-Crane Zither stopped trembling and gave two extremely faint flashes.
“That’s more like it.” Satisfied, Yu Qingtang stroked its strings to soothe it. “Good. As long as we cooperate happily, whenever you help in a crisis, I’ll invite a beautiful Fairy to hold you and pet you afterward. That should be acceptable, right?”
This time, the Dragon-Crane Zither flashed with genuine enthusiasm and without the slightest hesitation.
Yu Qingtang promptly stuffed it back into his storage ring.
Ye Chenyan raised an eyebrow. “What other Fairies have you met in Nanzhou?”
“Senior Sister Tianxin,” Yu Qingtang answered casually.
“No matter how strange its preferences are, it’s still just a zither. It only wants her to touch it a couple of times. Senior Sister Tianxin would probably agree.”
“And failing that, there’s Pretty Butterfly. She may belong to the Pleasure Sect, but demon cultivators are still cultivators. To ordinary mortals, they’re all immortals. Calling her a ‘Fairy’ isn’t much of a stretch, is it?”
Now that the Dragon-Crane Zither had already agreed, Yu Qingtang was perfectly willing to turn a blind eye.
Ye Chenyan laughed softly. “And when none of them are around...”
Yu Qingtang sighed deeply. “Then I’ll have to do it myself.”
“It’s not as though I’ve never worn a dress before. The first time is unfamiliar; the second comes naturally.”
“Besides, everyone already knows I’m a man...” He pointed at himself with righteous conviction. “Though women’s clothes may cover my body, the heart beneath remains a man’s.”
Ye Chenyan failed to hold back his laughter.
Yu Qingtang pointed accusingly at him. “What are you laughing at?”
Still smiling, Ye Chenyan slung the demonic weapon across his back. After a moment’s hesitation, he took out the silver battle spear as well.
It had already begun falling behind his cultivation during the Golden Core Competition. Only after Chi Yantian retempered it had it managed to accompany him this far.
From here onward, it would probably be unable to keep pace.
Propping up his chin, Yu Qingtang reached out and stroked the silver battle spear as well. “Can’t bear to part with it?”
“Not exactly...” Ye Chenyan’s gaze flickered. He said quietly, “It just feels a little regrettable. I’ve used it for a long time.”
Yu Qingtang laughed, then suddenly pointed at the recess where the demonic weapon had originally rested. “Why don’t we leave it there?”
Ye Chenyan turned around. “Huh?”
“For the next Demonic Sovereign, millions of years from now.” Yu Qingtang grinned and patted him on the shoulder. “By then, you’ll definitely have become some extraordinary figure.”
“Throughout history, anything touched by even the faintest trace of a true immortal or true demon has become unbelievably powerful. This spear carries your aura. By then, it’ll surely have become a supreme weapon that looks down upon the entire world. Perfect for passing down from generation to generation.”
Ye Chenyan ran a hand over the shaft of the silver battle spear. He lifted his eyes to Yu Qingtang and laughed softly. “All right.”
He suddenly seized the spearhead and sliced open his palm, soaking the weapon in his blood before letting go. Then he raised an eyebrow proudly.
“Now it has my blood on it. If I become immortal, it will truly deserve to be called an immortal’s weapon.”
“Hiss—” Yu Qingtang sucked in a sharp breath at the blood in his palm. “All right, all right, we get it! Hurry and wipe that off! Do you seriously not fear pain?”
Ye Chenyan raised his hand.
The wound in his palm was already healing at a speed visible to the naked eye.
Yu Qingtang: “...”
That was a little excessive, my friend.
Ye Chenyan stood before the recess and gripped the silver battle spear with both hands. He called Yu Qingtang over and indicated for him to place his hands on it as well.
“Hmm?” Yu Qingtang looked surprised. “Me too?”
“Mm.” Smiling, Ye Chenyan took his hand and placed it over the spear shaft beside his own. “Let it share in some of the good fortune of our Great General of Finding Time to Slack Off and Enjoy Life.”
“Hehe.” Yu Qingtang smiled too. “Since you put it that way, I suppose I can reluctantly lend a hand.”
Together, they held the silver battle spear and drove it forcefully into the recess.
The weapon gave a resonant hum, as though answering them.
“Let’s go.” Ye Chenyan turned, took Yu Qingtang’s hand, and smiled with unrestrained confidence, every inch of him brimming with youthful vigor. “The next time it emerges, the legends told beneath heaven will be about us.”
“I get a place in the legend too?” Yu Qingtang followed him with a smile. “I’d rather keep a low profile and quietly enjoy life.”
The two walked out of the Demon-Suppressing Tower together.
The demon race’s seventy-two divisions were already waiting in orderly rows before the underground palace.
They shouted in unison, “Welcome, Demonic Sovereign! Welcome, sect master!”
The display nearly frightened Yu Qingtang into diving straight back into the tower. Fortunately, Ye Chenyan caught him and dragged him forward, allowing him to barely maintain an outward appearance of composure.
Yu Qingtang lowered his voice. “They aren’t going to shout that everywhere you go from now on, are they?”
“I don’t want them to,” Ye Chenyan muttered back. “What a nuisance.”
He cleared his throat and addressed them. “Unless something major has happened, there’s no need to salute me in the future. We’re leaving.”
He had just begun leading Yu Qingtang away when Pretty Butterfly squeezed out of the crowd.
“Why are you running? We’re going back to the Pleasure Sect to celebrate! I already sent people to fetch Wooden Head, Loudmouth Scholar, and the stupid monk!”
“Ahem.” The head of the Hundred-Illusion Butterfly clan was a beautiful middle-aged woman. Her clothing resembled the styles of the other provinces more than those of Nanzhou, and her features were gentle and refined.
She helplessly shook her head and gave Pretty Butterfly a light tug. “Silly girl. Do not be rude.”
“Auntie Huan—” Pretty Butterfly whined at her. “I’m already one of the most polite people in the Pleasure Sect! Besides, didn’t one of those human books you taught me say something about not being moved and not yielding? If I started treating them differently now, wouldn’t that make me look like a petty villain instead?”
Auntie Huan laughed softly. “You glib little girl. You’ve forgotten everything I taught you again.”
“It begins, ‘Neither riches nor honor can—’”
“Come on, come on!” Pretending not to hear, Pretty Butterfly jumped up and waved at them. She planted her hands on her hips in feigned anger. “Hey! You didn’t become sect master and decide you’re too important to acknowledge me now, did you?”
“How could I dare?” Ye Chenyan laughed. “I don’t have to return to the Immortal-Bewildering Forest today anyway. Let’s go celebrate.”
He lowered his voice and asked Yu Qingtang, “There’ll be good food. You’re not going to refuse, are you?”
Yu Qingtang replied at the same volume, “Free food is free food!”
Thunderous cheers erupted below.
...
Nanzhou, Pleasure Sect.
Despite having been in Nanzhou for so long, this was Yu Qingtang and Ye Chenyan’s first visit to the Pleasure Sect’s headquarters.
The Pleasure Sect was nominally a sect, but in reality, it resembled a settlement.
At the border between the foot of Great Wilderness Mountain and Nanzhou City, the demon race’s seventy-two divisions had divided the land among themselves. Entire families had moved in and made their homes there.
Their method of holding a banquet was also unlike anything in the other provinces.
A large table stood in the center, with smaller tables scattered around it. The dishes were placed only on the central table, and everyone served themselves.
It looked like a buffet, but it was far more dangerous.
Yu Qingtang stared in shock as a plate of meat was carried out. Several Pleasure Sect disciples swarmed it at once, and with only a few rapid grabs of their chopsticks, the entire dish vanished.
“Ye Chenyan! Yu Qingtang!”
Even amid the surrounding clamor, Chi Yantian’s powerful voice was impossible to underestimate. One shout from him drew everyone’s attention.
Yu Qingtang hurriedly answered and waved at him.
Ye Chenyan laughed and sighed helplessly. “What is this? This is supposed to be my victory banquet. Why did everyone start eating before I arrived?”
Candle Nine Yin cleared his throat. “Members of the demon race are accustomed to being undisciplined. If they go too far, simply strike them.”
Yu Qingtang: “...”
“They’ve already started, so we can’t afford to lose!” Chi Yantian pointed toward the members of the Pleasure Sect. “This is the first time I’ve ever met people even more impatient than I am. The instant a dish leaves the wok, they all rush forward to seize it.”
“And they even have a perfectly righteous excuse. They say food tastes best while fresh, so if they finish this batch before you arrive, you’ll get to eat the next batch straight from the wok...”
Yu Qingtang asked curiously, “Where’s Scholar Xiao?”
“Hmm?” Chi Yantian whipped his head around in shock. “He was just here!”
“Over there!” Pretty Butterfly laughed gleefully. “If you don’t hurry and save him, someone’s about to drag him inside.”
Not far away, Scholar Xiao was speaking with a beautiful female cultivator. He held a booklet and took notes with great concentration.
By now, they had reached the doorway of a room.
The woman laughed softly, stepped inside, then suddenly reached out and grabbed him by the collar, attempting to drag him in after her.
Scholar Xiao had clearly prepared for this. He seized the doorframe, stepped through some unknown footwork, and slipped free like an eel too slick to catch.
He even smiled at them. “No need to panic, no need to panic. You should keep a closer eye on little Brother Baoshan instead. I don’t know why everyone in the Pleasure Sect enjoys teasing monks so much...”
Yu Qingtang looked left and right. “Then where’s Baoshan?”
Scholar Xiao pointed casually. “I told him that no matter what anyone said, he absolutely could not leave that meditation cushion. I even brought him two vegetarian dishes. He should still be...”
“Hmm?”
When he failed to spot Baoshan, he began searching around in alarm. “Where did he go?”
Chi Yantian paused. “I saw a few people carry him away, meditation cushion and all...”
Pretty Butterfly flew into a rage. “Then why didn’t you stop them?”
Chi Yantian scratched his head. “I thought it was another Pleasure Sect celebration custom.”
He pointed toward the other side. “Look over there. They nearly threw someone into a cooking pot. I almost rushed over to save him, but then they told me it was a game.”
“Argh!” Pretty Butterfly stamped her foot in fury. “Baoshan! Stupid monk!”
She darted into some unknown room and emerged dragging a monk who still clung tightly to the meditation cushion beneath him.
His face was bright red, his entire body reeking of alcohol, and he kept muttering drunkenly, “This poor monk does not drink...”
Ye Chenyan raised an eyebrow and laughed softly. “It really is lively.”
Scholar Xiao warned him, “Do not merely enjoy the spectacle, Brother Ye. All sorts of people mingle here. You had better keep a close eye on Brother Yu.”
Ye Chenyan froze, then instinctively turned around. “Wait. Where’s Yu Qingtang? He...”
“Right here!”
Yu Qingtang appeared from nowhere and shoved a plate of braised beef into his hands, grinning triumphantly.
“I saw the cook carrying out a fresh dish, so I intercepted him and robbed a little before it reached the table!”
A sharp gleam flashed in his eyes. “Come on. Let’s sit over there. Every cook has to pass that spot to serve the dishes. Prime location!”
Laughing, Ye Chenyan allowed himself to be pulled away while Yu Qingtang began assigning battle positions.
“Scholar Xiao, we’re still missing a staple food. Keep watch.”
Scholar Xiao nodded solemnly. “I shall not fail this mission!”
Yu Qingtang continued issuing orders. “Brother Chi, block their line of sight from that side. Pretend you’re still going to fight over food at the central table. We’ll create a diversion.”
Chi Yantian smacked his palms together. “Leave it to me!”
Then he asked casually, “Hey, Ye. Now that you can move around freely, are you going to the auction in two days?”
His eyes immediately lit up.
“Where did that spear on your back come from? Let me see!”
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