AnimeMan: The 13th Princess’s Overpowered Servant

Suddenly, a group of frenzied humans rushed him from behind. They grabbed his silver armor. They tried to pull him down.

Merlin did not use his laser attacks. He spun his spear around. He used the blunt wooden shaft like a simple bo staff. He moved with flawless, beautiful martial arts precision. He tapped the pressure points on the humans' necks. He knocked them unconscious with minimal physical force. He laid them gently on the ground.

"Flawless non-lethal takedowns," Ken mumbled lazily. "Merlin is a true professional. He completely understands the pacifist run rules."

Leviathan glided across the battlefield. The Demon Queen of the Serpents looked absolutely disgusted. She hated the black rain. She hated the dirty cobblestones. She hated the muddy puddles.

"This water is entirely filthy," Leviathan complained loudly. She crossed her arms over her sleek emerald dress. "It is toxic and sticky. I refuse to let this garbage touch my clothes."

She summoned a massive, high-pressure wave of pure, clean ocean water. The clean water crashed through the streets. It washed the black rain away. It hit a group of frenzied citizens. Leviathan hoped the clean water would wash the dark magic out of their brains.

The clean water soaked the citizens. It washed the dirt off their faces. But their eyes still glowed a toxic red. They stayed completely crazy. They splashed through the puddles and charged at her.

"Washing them does not work," Leviathan scoffed. She looked highly annoyed. She swung her water whip. She wrapped the whip around their waists. She gently tossed the screaming humans onto the roof of a nearby building. They rolled safely onto the flat roof. They could not climb down. They were totally stranded and out of the way.

Ryu stood in the center of the plaza. The massive dragon-man looked incredibly frustrated. He crossed his huge, muscular arms. He glared at the human mob.

He could not turn into his giant red dragon form. If he turned into a giant dragon, he would crush hundreds of innocent citizens by accident. He could not breathe his massive ocean of crimson fire. The fire would roast the humans instantly. He was completely stripped of his ultimate attacks.

"This is completely ridiculous!" Ryu roared loudly. He kicked a broken stone pillar. "I am the ultimate weapon of destruction! I am supposed to turn cities to ash! I am not a babysitter!"

"Just grab them and put them in a pile, Ryu," Ken suggested lazily in his mind.

Ryu grumbled. He walked forward. He used his immense physical strength. He grabbed five frenzied humans in his giant arms. He held them like small, angry dolls. He carried them over to Joseph's stone cages. He dropped them gently inside.

"I am a legendary dragon," Ryu muttered bitterly. "And I am picking up tiny humans. This is highly embarrassing."

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The battle raged on. The rain kept falling. The Black Spirits kept pouring out of the dark alleys. The frenzied mob kept attacking everything in sight. The commanders juggled the two threats perfectly. They destroyed the monsters. They safely neutralized the civilians.

Ken sat on his rock. He held his concrete umbrella. He watched the massive three-way battle.

Suddenly, a loud, angry scream echoed right beside him.

A frenzied butcher climbed up the rock. The butcher had glowing red eyes. He held a large wooden rolling pin. He swung the rolling pin directly at Ken's head. He wanted to smash the lazy boy.

Ken did not panic. He did not pull out a weapon. He did not drop his concrete umbrella.

Ken simply tilted his head two inches to the left.

The wooden rolling pin sailed past his ear. It missed him entirely. The butcher lost his balance. The butcher stumbled forward.

Ken casually stuck his foot out. The butcher tripped over Ken's cheap shoe. The butcher tumbled off the rock. He landed face-first in a soft puddle of mud. He was totally knocked out.

"Observation Haki," Ken joked lazily. He took a bite of his candy. "You cannot hit what you cannot touch. It is basic anime dodging."

Another frenzied citizen jumped onto the rock. It was a local tailor. The tailor swung a pair of large metal scissors.

Ken stood up. He slouched his shoulders. He took a single, casual step backward.

"Flash Step," Ken mumbled.

He moved with absolute, god-like speed. To the normal eye, it looked like he simply slid across the rock. The scissors snapped completely empty air. Ken casually tapped the tailor on the back of the neck with two fingers. The tailor instantly fell asleep. He slumped onto the stone.

Ken sighed. He stepped off the rock. He walked straight into the middle of the chaotic plaza.

He held his concrete umbrella over his head. The black rain splashed around him. He dragged his shoes through the puddles.

"These puddles are a massive problem," Ken complained loudly. He looked down at his feet. "My socks are getting wet. Wet socks are the true villain of this entire war. It is an incredibly uncomfortable feeling. I cannot fight evil with damp toes. This is a severe tragedy."

He casually strolled through the battlefield.

A Black Spirit lunged at him with a shadow sword. Ken did not look at it. He just stepped slightly to the right. The shadow sword missed. Karna shot a golden arrow from a nearby roof. The arrow hit the spirit. The spirit turned to ash.

A group of crazed humans rushed toward Ken. They waved their pitchforks.

Ken just kept walking. He weaved effortlessly through the angry crowd. He moved exactly like a leaf floating on a river. He stepped left. He ducked slightly. He paused for a fraction of a second. Every single attack missed him completely. He strolled through the mob without a single scratch on his navy blue suit.

"This is a massive battle royale," Ken analyzed lazily. He looked around the crowded street. "Everyone is fighting everyone. It is total madness. We just need a guy with a straw hat to stretch his arms and punch everyone at once. That would solve the problem very fast."

The situation remained totally unresolved. The commanders were doing a fantastic job. They were knocking out the civilians safely. They were destroying the Black Spirits.

But the black rain kept falling. The toxic purple light kept shining from the Neitherworld Devil Flower in the distance.

As long as the flower bloomed, the rain would not stop. As long as the rain fell, the citizens would stay completely insane. The commanders could fight all night, but they could not knock out every single person in the massive capital city.

"This is incredibly tedious," Ken decided silently. He stopped walking. He held his concrete umbrella. He stared at the giant, glowing purple flower in the center of the city.

"We need to stop the rain at its source," Ken thought. He slouched his shoulders even further. "If I turn that flower off, the rain stops. The NPCs go back to normal. The escort mission ends. I can finally go back to my estate and eat a real dinner."

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