"I am not late," Ken replied lazily. He popped a potato chip into his mouth. "I arrived at the exact perfect time. The first four minutes of any meeting are just boring introductions. I skipped the boring part. It is a highly efficient time-management strategy. I read about it in a business magazine once."
Laxmi burst out laughing. The fire user sat on the edge of the table. She tossed a tiny orange spark between her fingers. "You do not read business magazines, Ken! You only read comic books about magic ninjas!"
"Ninja comic books teach excellent business skills," Ken argued casually. He shoved his free hand deep into his pocket. "They teach you how to hide from your boss. That is a very valuable corporate skill."
Naomi walked over to Ken. A few weeks ago, Naomi would have yelled at him. She would have scolded him for his untucked shirt. She would have called him a slacker. But she did not do that today. She smiled a very warm, incredibly fond smile. Her green eyes looked soft and caring. She playfully bumped her shoulder against his arm.
"Leave him alone, Olivia," Naomi said gently. She reached out and patted Ken's arm. "He is here now. That is all that matters. You made it just in time for the good part, Ken. We are going on a monster hunt today."
Olivia stared at Naomi. Olivia looked absolutely stunned. She could not believe what she was hearing.
Naomi was the fierce vanguard leader. Naomi was famous for being strict and aggressive. Naomi usually demanded absolute perfection from everyone. But right now, Naomi was smiling at a boy who looked like a walking laundry pile. She was actually defending his laziness.
"Naomi," Olivia said slowly. She gripped her spear tighter. "He is eating a cookie during a briefing. He is slouching. He is showing zero respect for the chain of command. Why are you permitting this behavior?"
"Because it is just Ken," Naomi chuckled softly. She looked at Ken with pure fondness. "He always acts like this. He complains a lot. But he is a great teammate. Do not worry about his clothes. Just tell us about the mission."
Olivia felt a massive wave of pure confusion wash over her brain. She looked at Sayma. Sayma pushed her thick glasses up the bridge of her nose. The intelligent Vice-Captain offered a polite, calm smile. Sayma also did not look annoyed by Ken.
"Naomi is completely correct," Sayma agreed smoothly. She clicked her pen and opened her neat notebook. "Ken operates on a very unique frequency. His presence provides a relaxing atmosphere for the vanguard. It reduces our overall combat stress. Please proceed with the tactical data, Olivia."
Olivia took a slow, deep breath. She did not understand this dynamic at all. She felt like she had stepped into a bizarre alternate reality. The elite warriors of the 13th Unit were actively making excuses for a totally messy, uncoordinated boy.
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"Very well," Olivia announced firmly. She turned her attention back to the large map on the table. "The Upper Council has assigned us a perimeter clearing mission. A large pack of rogue beasts has migrated into the abandoned stone quarry just outside the city limits. They are massive, aggressive creatures. They possess thick, rock-like armor."
"Rock armor?" Zinia asked. The strong earth mage cracked her knuckles loudly. She grinned a tough, confident grin. "That sounds like my kind of fight. I can break their armor. I will smash them into pebbles."
"We must eliminate the entire pack before they move closer to the civilian districts," Olivia continued. She pointed her wooden rod at the map. "We will march to the quarry. We will establish a tight defensive line. We will draw them out and terminate them systematically. Nobody breaks formation. Nobody acts independently."
Luna let out a massive, dramatic yawn. The sleepy lightning user rested her head on the table. "Walking all the way to the quarry sounds incredibly exhausting. Can we just send them a polite letter asking them to leave? I really want to take a nap on my soft bed."
Risa hugged her stuffed teddy bear. The pink-haired healer looked a little bit nervous. "Are the monsters scary? I do not like scary things."
"Do not worry, Risa," Princess Iris spoke softly. The violet-eyed royal stood at the head of the table. She looked completely calm. "The vanguard will protect you. You will stay in the backline with Sayma and Ken. You will be entirely safe."
Ken raised his hand lazily. He held a potato chip between his fingers.
"I have a quick question," Ken mumbled. He chewed the chip. "If I am in the backline, does that mean I can bring a folding chair? Standing on rocks is very bad for my lower back. I need proper lumbar support. Also, is there a shaded area? The sun makes me sweat, and sweating ruins my hair."
Olivia glared at him. Her dark eyes flashed with intense, strict annoyance.
"You are not bringing a chair," Olivia commanded coldly. "You are a registered member of this unit. You will participate in the mission. You will not hide in the back. You will maintain situational awareness at all times. I will personally ensure that you do not slack off today."
Ken slouched his shoulders even further. He let out a long, miserable groan.
"This is a severe violation of my personal boundaries," Ken complained loudly. He stared at the ceiling. "I am going to file a formal complaint regarding labor laws. The Emperor never said anything about mandatory cardio. This is an unsafe work environment. I demand union representation."
Laxmi burst out laughing. The fire user sat on the window sill. She tossed a tiny orange spark into the air. "You do not even know what a union is, Ken! You just want an excuse to go back to sleep!"
"I am a very strong advocate for workers' rights," Ken lied smoothly. He popped another chip into his mouth. "My right to take a nap is being totally ignored. I am oppressed."
"Move your feet, slacker," Naomi smiled warmly. She gently grabbed his arm and pulled him toward the door. "You can complain the entire walk there. I will listen to all your labor grievances. Let us go."
The 13th Unit filed out of the strategy room. They grabbed their weapons from the hallway. They marched out of the estate gates and headed toward the city limits.
The walk to the abandoned stone quarry took an hour. The morning sun shined brightly. The air grew warmer. The paved city streets slowly turned into a dusty, uneven dirt path.
Ken dragged his cheap shoes on the dirt. Scuff. Scuff. Scuff. He stayed at the very back of the group. He pulled a wrapped strawberry candy from his pocket. He unwrapped it slowly and ate it. He looked incredibly bored.
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