Silence once again filled the room after Marristella left. Seraphiel slowly turned her head toward the large window on the far side of the room while her eyes quietly stared at the rain falling outside. She did not blink for a long while as her mind continued replaying every word her mother had spoken.
She had always believed she understood herself better than anyone else because she had spent years making decisions through calm judgment and logic, yet today she found herself unable to explain even the emotions inside her own heart.
But...something felt different now.
Her heart strangely felt much lighter than before, and even her eyes seemed clearer. Without circulating any Spirit or using any perception technique, she could somehow see much farther into the distance than usual. The rain, the buildings beyond the villa and even the distant streets all appeared unusually clear to her. She remained quietly looking outside until a warm sensation rolled down her cheek. Only then did she realize a small tear had escaped from the corner of her eye.
"...Am I crying again?" she muttered while touching the tear with her fingertips. She stared at the moisture resting on her finger for several moments before lowering her hand once again. ’No...is this because of what Mother said?...Because I have been refusing to accept the emotion I am feeling?’ She gently wiped the remaining tears away before stepping down from the bed and slowly walking toward the window. Outside, the rain continued falling over Solara while only one sentence continued echoing inside her mind.
’Accept your own emotions.’
Yet...how was she supposed to do that? She had spent her entire life learning business, negotiating trades, managing the financial structure of the Rosaria Household and making decisions that affected countless people. Those were things she understood completely because every decision followed logic. Profit and loss, trust and risk, value and exchange...those were things she could calculate. But emotions...were different.
There was no correct answer, no calculation and no experience she could rely on.
Even though she had grown up as one of the happiest children anyone could wish for, that did not mean she understood every emotion or knew how to accept feelings she had never experienced before. Her parents had always protected her and allowed her to pursue whatever she wanted, but neither books nor experience had ever taught her something like this. It was the first time in her life she had reached a problem that logic alone could not solve.
Her thoughts slowly drifted back to the first day she had met Atlas. At that time she had only seen him as another Explorer who wanted to trade. Then she remembered how confused he had been after obtaining the Epic Rank Relic, the conversations they had during their meetings and the way he always remained cautious regardless of who stood before him. One memory after another quietly surfaced inside her mind until she realized she could recall every small detail without even trying.
’Why did everything change within only a few days?’ she questioned herself. ’Is accepting these emotions really the only way to understand them?...’
She wanted to know more about Atlas, that much was true... She wanted to know why he carried so many negative emotions inside him despite being so young. She wanted to know why he constantly entered dangerous Ruins without giving himself enough time to rest.
Every experienced Explorer understood the importance of recovery, yet Atlas seemed completely indifferent toward it. It was as though he was constantly chasing something without allowing himself to stop even for a moment.
She tried convincing herself that all of those thoughts were nothing more than curiosity. Atlas was different from everyone she had ever met, so naturally she wanted to understand him better. That explanation sounded reasonable, yet the very moment she accepted it, the familiar sting returned inside her heart. It wasn’t painful, but it was enough to make her widen her eyes slightly as realization slowly settled inside her mind.
It wasn’t curiosity.
It had never been curiosity.
Just as her mother had said, she already knew what that emotion was. She had simply continued refusing to acknowledge it because accepting it meant admitting that someone had entered her heart after knowing him for only a few days. As someone who always relied on reason, that conclusion felt impossible to accept, so she had unconsciously continued searching for another explanation.
She slowly lowered her head while looking at her own hand.
Unknowingly, she had wanted to remain the same businesswoman she had always been. She did not want unfamiliar emotions to influence her judgment or change the person she had spent years becoming. Yet no matter how much she tried separating those feelings from herself, they continued growing stronger every time she thought about Atlas.
’I...I really love him huh?...’
Her lips moved almost unconsciously as those words escaped from them, ’I can’t take him out of my head even for a second...is this...what love is?’
She slowly raised one hand before placing it over her chest. The moment she closed her eyes, she could clearly feel every beat of her heart. Each beat sounded clearer than before, almost as if her own heart was answering the question she had finally stopped running away from.
THUMP...THUMP...THUMP...
She remained standing there for a long while before finally releasing a slow breath. The heaviness that had remained inside her chest since Atlas left had completely disappeared. She no longer questioned her own feelings, nor did she try searching for another explanation. She had finally accepted them exactly as they were.
Only then did she slowly open her eyes again.
If someone had been standing before her at that exact moment, they would have immediately noticed that something inside her eyes had changed. Her gaze was much clearer than before, but that was only the beginning.
Deep within her pupils, three tiny silver markings appeared without her realizing it. They resembled the hands of a clock, one pointing upward, another downward and the last diagonally toward the side. They remained completely motionless as though they had always existed inside her eyes.
Seraphiel herself remained completely unaware of that change. She simply looked outside through the rain-covered window before a small smile slowly appeared on her face. It was not the calm smile she wore during business negotiations or formal gatherings. It was a simple smile that appeared naturally after she finally understood something about herself.
"So...this is what it feels like to accept my emotions?" she murmured softly before letting out a small laugh. "Hehe...it actually feels amazing. Now...I just have to make him fall for me too."
The confusion that had remained inside her heart until now completely disappeared. In its place remained only certainty. She no longer questioned whether she loved Atlas or not because she already knew the answer. The only thing left now was deciding what she would do with those feelings.
Without wasting any more time, she turned around and walked toward the exit of her room. For the first time in her life, she had already decided what she wanted to do next without calculating every possible outcome beforehand.
As the door slowly closed behind her, neither Seraphiel nor anyone inside the Rosaria Household realized that the moment she accepted her own emotions without denying them any longer...
She had already awakened her Unique Ability...
...despite not even reaching S-rank yet.
[A/N: I apologise to all the readers if these two Chapters feel rushed or too small and illogical, I was so sick today that i couldn’t even sit up from bed for 6 whole hours yet I still tried to write these two Chapters.
And also I would like to Thank you all, Because of all your support, even the smallest amount, I will be getting my very first payment from NovelPhoenix for this Novel, I will be working hard even more toward making Atlas’s journey even more Appealing and Engaging. Thank you all.
And last but not the least this shameless author begs for a Gift, shower him with gifts will you!!]
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