A short while later, Cedric finally returned to the room.
Rebecca turned her head, and her gaze immediately found his as he stood there. "You are back," she said softly, and there was such innocence and warmth in her voice that Cedric immediately felt guilty for leaving her alone for as long as he had.
He had only meant to give her some time to herself, yet the longer he had remained outside, the more ridiculous he had begun to feel about the entire situation.
"I’m sorry I kept you waiting," he said eventually as he stepped further into the room.
"It’s alright," Rebecca assured him, and when silence settled between them again, Cedric glanced towards the bathing room. "I’ll just go freshen up," he said, and Rebecca gave him a quiet nod.
Cedric disappeared almost immediately, leaving Rebecca staring after him.
She had never imagined that a man who could stand confidently before soldiers and face danger without hesitation could become this nervous simply because he was alone with his wife. There was something almost amusing about it, although she knew she was not exactly calm herself.
She shifted beneath the duvet and let out a quiet breath, wondering what had made him so nervous. They had already exchanged their vows, they had already kissed in front of everyone, and they were husband and wife now, yet somehow being alone together seemed to make everything feel different.
Cedric was not gone for too long, although Rebecca could hear the faint sounds of movement from the other side of the door.
When he eventually returned, he had changed into a comfortable white loose shirt and trousers, and his dark hair was tousled over his face from washing it. He looked much more relaxed than he had earlier, although Rebecca could still notice the slight tension in his movements as he approached the bed.
Rebecca absentmindedly tightened her grip on the edge of the duvet when he came closer, and she watched from the corner of her eye as he lifted the covers and settled beside her. Cedric pulled the duvet over himself as well because the room had grown cold, although the fire crackling in the fireplace offered some warmth. Once he was comfortable, he rested his head against the pillow and faced the ceiling, just as Rebecca was doing.
There was just silence, until, "This feels nice," Cedric said with a soft smile, and something about the simplicity of his words made Rebecca’s heart settle a little.
Rebecca hummed quietly, although her eyes narrowed slightly as she stared at the ceiling. "I thought you wouldn’t come back," she muttered under her breath.
Cedric immediately turned his head towards her, his gaze finding her profile as she continued looking away from him. "What made you think that?"
Rebecca hesitated before answering, "That I would have to spend the night alone," she whispered.
Cedric’s brows pulled together, and he looked at her with a seriousness that made her finally turn towards him. "I wouldn’t do that," he said quietly.
He had never intended to leave her alone for the entire night. He had only needed a little time to gather himself because the thought of returning to the room and lying beside Rebecca as her husband had made his heart race in a way that no battle ever had.
He had also thought that she might need time to prepare herself, because he knew that this was just as new for her as it was for him. Leaving the room had seemed like the safest thing to do at the time, although he had not considered how his actions might have made her feel.
Rebecca studied his face for a moment before the corner of her lips lifted into a small smile. "I know... Seeing as you’re here now."
The time Cedric had spent outside the room was enough to fall asleep and If her mind had not been occupied with wondering when he would return, she probably would have drifted off without even realising it.
The long journey had exhausted her, but she had already taken a nap in the carriage, so she did not feel particularly tired anymore. Instead, she had remained awake because some part of her had simply wanted to know that Cedric would come back.
And now he was here.
"Are you feeling cold?" Cedric suddenly asked, drawing her out of her thoughts.
Rebecca blinked and looked at him. "A little."
"Come close then," he said, and his voice was so smooth and velvety that Rebecca felt warmth creep into her cheeks. "So that we may keep each other warm," he added, and she lifted the duvet slightly before moving closer to him.
She settled on her side while he stretched out his arm for her to rest upon, then wrapped the other around her waist until their fingers became intertwined. He held her close from behind, his chest against her back as he asked quietly, "Is it comfortable now?"
"Yes," Rebecca whispered, although her attention had already been drawn to their joined hands as Cedric’s thumb slowly caressed the back of hers.
She pressed her lips together, trying to keep herself composed when her heart was beating so loudly that she could only hope he couldn’t hear it. Then again, she wondered about his own heart, because she could feel its rapid rhythm against her back, and the realization only made her more aware of how close they were.
Rebecca’s mind continued to race with thoughts, and judging from the tension in Cedric’s body, he was doing the same. She murmured, "I wasn’t expecting you to be this shy."
"What?" Cedric asked, clearly flustered by the observation before he quickly added, "I’m not."
"I can tell you’re nervous," Rebecca said, the slight curve of her lips betraying the amusement in her voice. Cedric looked as though he was about to defend himself, but she spoke before he could. "But that’s okay, because I’m just as nervous as you are about this."
He drew in a deep breath, and when he finally spoke, his voice had lost some of its usual certainty. "This will be my first time," he admitted, and Rebecca’s eyes widened in genuine surprise.
"I wasn’t sure how to go about it, and I didn’t want to ruin the moment. That was why I thought giving you enough space and time would help, but it looks like that isn’t working either, because we’re both nervous and neither of us really knows how to settle into this."
Rebecca’s lips parted slightly as she turned around to face him, and Cedric’s gaze immediately settled on her. The golden candlelight reflected softly across her face, making her dark eyes appear even deeper as they remained fixed on his, and then his attention fell to her lips. They looked inviting in the candlelight, and for a moment, he found himself staring before remembering that she was watching him too.
"You’re not ruining it, Cedric," she said softly. "I think feeling like this is normal for both of us."
"Oh," he muttered, and Rebecca nodded as the tension between them eased slightly.
A smile slowly spread across her lips, and she almost laughed. "I wouldn’t have believed that if you weren’t so serious."
"Please don’t make fun of me," Cedric muttered under his breath...
"I’m not" Rebecca said softly. It was just that... It was almost difficult to believe that a man like him had reached this point in his life without ever allowing himself to experience something like this.
Cedric had been raised by a father who demanded discipline and focus, and as he grew older, he learned to put his duties before himself until there was hardly room for anything else.
Even when his fellow soldiers talked about women, he rarely stayed around to listen, and that had earned him the occasional teasing.
Some had called him a monk, while others had wondered if he simply wasn’t interested in women at all. Cedric himself had never cared enough to explain himself, because none of it had mattered to him.
Throughout those years, he had a few opportunities. He simply never wanted anyone badly enough to act on them. Then Rebecca happened.
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