Fallen Mage Regressor

Cultist Confections.

Mal stared up at the sign on top of the doorway as the afternoon outdoor sun lit up the symbols. Off to the right of the lettering, there was an engraving of a cupcake with a cherry on top.

When he’d heard that there was cult activity in public, he wasn’t sure what to make of it. He’d decided on the spot that he needed to inspect it for himself.

Of all things, a cake shop wasn't on his shortlist of possibilities.

“Yet another bust,” he sighed.

I’m getting really tired of all of these false flags.

He shifted to turn and froze in place.

Staring at him from across a table was a familiar orange-haired, red-eyed young woman.

Her cheeks were stuffed with cake and a little bit of frosting had somehow made its way onto her nose.

“Hemp, how are you doing?” Mal asked.

Hemp swallowed down the last of the cake and scooted back in her seat. Her eyes conspicuously flickered toward another flavor of cake displayed in the window of the confection shop.

After a few moments of thought, Mal went inside and bought what she'd been looking at. He stepped back outside then put the cake in front of her. She looked up at him, then at the cake, then back back up at him.

“Consider it a bonus.”

“But... but... gluttony! Gluttony is a sin, Mal!”

“I'm sure that it is, Hemp.”

Saliva dripped out of the corner of her mouth and down toward the table.

“Eternus forgive me.” Her hand shook. “I cannot resist the temptation any longer.”

Her fork stabbed out and landed right on the corner with all the precision of a master archer. In the fastest movement that Mal had ever witnessed, the cake was transported from the plate into her mouth within a fraction of a second.

He hadn't been expecting to come across Hemp, but he supposed that this was as much of an opportunity as anything else to see how she was doing. It wouldn't be any good if his future spymaster would turn out to be on the edge of changing her mind.

“How are you holding up?” Mal asked.

“How am I holding up?” She gulped down another slice. “I should be asking you that. You look like you haven't slept a wink.”

A dry chuckle escaped Mal's mouth.

He hadn't slept a wink. The sheer terror of what had almost happened kept him late into the night. The image of Lusia's body, pale and on the verge of death, was something that he didn't think he'd ever be able to erase. It reminded him too much of her death in the first timeline.

And in the back of his head, the words of Golial repeated over and over.

He forced the thought away. Lusia was just Lusia. Golial was being delusional as per usual, or trying to cause trouble.

“Hey. Hey, Mal? You alive over there?”

Mal jolted as if somebody had sent a shock through him.

“..It was a long night.”

“Oh, so the mysterious student finally got some, huh? I didn't know you were that much of a perv.” Her tone darkened and she scoffed. “You should ask for forgiveness from Eternus. Now.”

Mal rubbed his forehead. A blooming migraine had started to spout along the top of the ridge line between his hair and head.

“You hate the church,” Mal said. “I still don't really understand how exactly you square that with the whole holier-than-thou persona you've got going.”

“Yeah, I hate the church. That doesn't mean I'm going to hold Eternus accountable for what they do.”

“That doesn't make any sense.”

Hemp stared at him like he was an idiot who just proclaimed that the sky was bright pink with polka dots.

“The church,” she said slowly. “is a man-made institution. Eternus is the creator of the universe and the only reason why I still live.”

“Yeah, but the journey to get here was ridiculous and unfair and you went through...” vague ideas of what had happened to her flashed in his head. “a lot.”

“I did. But I'm here now, aren't I?” She raised an eyebrow. “What, are you thinking of converting?”

Mal shrugged. “If you're asking whether or not I think Eternus exists, I know he does."

I had the mark to prove it.

“What, you're one of those sorts who thinks that Eternus is just a really powerful Archon or something?”

Even just a short few month or two ago Mal would have said yes.

After the sheer number of coincidences and stupidity that had occurred around him, his opinion had changed a little.

“He might be all powerful,” Mal said. “But he's not benevolent. He's an asshole with the worst sense of humor I think I've ever seen.”

At that, Hemp howled with laughter.

A few people looked over at them and Mal resisted the urge to shrink into his seat. He glanced behind himself and felt his heart leave his chest.

Seriously? THEM? NOW?!

At the other end of the street, Rolam, Philo, and Nima had shot a glance over at him. Mal quickly turned around and acted as if he hadn't seen them. With any luck, they wouldn't realize that it had been him.

“That's certainly one way to describe him,” Hemp wiped a tear from her eye. “It's probably not even completely wrong—”

“Shut up!” Mal hissed.

Hemp raised an eyebrow and leaned back in her chair. “What died and got into your panties?”

Mal flickered his eyes to the right and behind him.

“They're my circlemates,” Mal said. “And they have no idea what I've been doing with you, and it needs to stay that way.”

Her face turned completely blank. It reminded Mal of Lusia.

Then a wide, eerie smile stretched across her face from ear to ear.

“Thanks so much for inviting me out like this!" Her voice projected past Mal's ear and behind him. "I was so flattered that you would choose to spend time with me, dear.”

Mal choked on the air.

“What the hell are you doing?” He stood up and slammed his hands into the table. “Did you not hear what I just said?”

Through the reflection on a cup on the table over, Mal could see the three walking over to the confectionary. They all had cast a curious gaze over at Hemp for her outburst.

Buckets of sweat rolled down Mal's back. The robes he was in, previously warm and comfortable, now felt unbearably stifling.

“What is it, M—”

Mal slammed his palm over her mouth. She jumped out of her seat and did a perfect flip over to the right. Mal scrambled to chase her, knocking his own seat back.

“Oh, you're so rough!” She covered her mouth with her hand, eyes half-lidded in a demure manner. “You should be more gentle with me, sir.”

Mal was on the verge of frothing with rage.

“Hemp, I am going to break your kneecaps—!”

“What is this dishonorable behavior?”

Mal ducked his head down and drew his hood up. The sound of footsteps to his right indicated that the voice had come up just behind him.

Damn it, damn it, damn it—

“None of your business,” Mal deepened his tone. “Leave.”

“Leave? How could I leave a lady who's—?” Rolam's voice stopped. “Wait, you look really familiar...”

Mal was going to kill everybody here. His old plan of avoiding dark magic—screw that. He was going to summon 15 void orbs and bomb the entire city.

“Mal?” Rolam's voice came out deeply confused. “What are you doing?”

Mal tried his best to melt into the chair.

By all accounts, this was a perfectly lovely day for a gathering. It was a temperate outdoors afternoon. He had his circlemates all gathered at a table, along with someone that in a distant way, he considered a sort of friend (and future tool, but that was neither here nor there).

But a closer observation would reveal the cracks in this image.

Rolam seemed to either be on the verge of strangling or congratulating Mal. Philo had an expression of deep confusion. Nima had his legs tensed as if he was ready to run away in a heartbeat.

Hemp, in stark contrast to everyone else, still had that wide grin stretching across her cheeks. She looked like she was having the greatest day of her life.

Good for her, Mal thought. When I kill everybody at this table, she'll be sure to die happy.

“Forgive Philo for saying this, Mal, but—”

“What exactly are you doing?” Rolam pointed out. "And isn't this the girl from the—"

Nope, don't let him say that!

“I was eating.”

“No, the girl was eating. You were sitting there watching her, then you jumped to try to get her to shut up after acting like a cad in public.” Rolam shook his head. “That's my job, not yours.”

Hemp had forced Mal into a deeply uncomfortable position.

He couldn't very well tell them the truth—that Hemp was his partner in crime for stealing items from a member of the church and potentially assassinating said church member depending on how things went.

Maybe just being vague would be the right decision?

“I promised to assist Hemp with something and vice versa,” Mal said. “Whatever you're thinking, it's most likely wrong.”

A small gasp came from Hemp. Mal resisted the urge to slam his head into the table.

“That's all I am to you?” Hemp's eyes fluttered. “After all we've been through?”

Mal let out a strained laugh. “She's just joking.”

Rolam stared at Mal like he was scum on his boot.

“And you don't even have the decency to give this girl the truth? Instead, you're just playing with her? The sheer level of dishonor disgusts me!”

“For goodness's sake, man, it isn't like that!” Mal shouted.

“Excuse me—” Philo raised his hand. “Philo is confused about what the issue is. While Philo is disappointed that the Ape didn't tell us about his new lover, isn't this a good thing?”

Mal had never hated a group of people more in his entire life.

Nima grimaced. “T—there's a problem with that, Philo. The part that Rolam is angry about is that there's no way that this girl could ever be anything other than his mistress. And while there are some nobles who think that's perfectly acceptable, Rolam isn't that type, as you well know. Mal's playing with her heart.”

“Ah!” Philo's eyes lit up. “Because of the difference in classes. Mal is the son of a duke, whereas this girl is not the daughter of a duke.”

There was a brief look of offense that flashed over Hemp's face before it disappeared and she swooned back in her chair, back of her hand pressed against her forehead.

“All along, I was nothing more than a toy to you?" she said.

Before Mal could say anything in his defense, Nima continued talking.

“I'm a little bit confused,” Nima said. “When did Mal even have the time to pursue this relationship? Where did he even meet her?”

And just like that, the situation turned infinitely worse.

He needed to distract them. They couldn't go poking around into what Mal was doing.

No, there was only one choice. Something so shocking that they would have no response.

A long time ago, Hemp had given him this very advice.

“Take refuge in audacity,” she told him. “You'd be surprised how good of a shelter it makes.”

Mal smoothed over his face and breathed out slowly.

“She isn't my mistress,” Mal said. “She’s my fiancée.”

Hemp’s grin froze in place like brittle glass. Philo stared at Mal for several long seconds. Nima’s jaw dropped.

Rolam stood up abruptly and let out a cheer.

“Congratulations, Mal!” he shouted. “I’m so proud of you for doing the honorable thing!”

A flurry of questions hit Mal’s ear. He had nothing to respond with except a pained smile.

Mal gave Hemp’s ear a sharp tug.

“Ow, hey hey hey hey, what was that for?”

“You know exactly what that was for.”

After they’d finally managed to ward off the rest of Mal’s circlemates, Mal had been left alone with Hemp. “Give the couple some private time,” Rolam had said.

“Jeez, jeez, I’m sorry!” Hemp couldn’t help but giggle. “Your face—your face was so red!”

Mal tugged on her ear harder.

“Ow ow ow ow!”

His grip slackened.

She’d made that laugh in the first timeline. That outrageous, half-giggle, half-snort that would have gotten her kicked out of any social function with a noble in it. But then the longer she’d been with him, the less and less she’d made that noise.

His hand dropped and fell to his side. She cast a curious look up at him. “Weird show of mercy, but okay.”

Mal wouldn’t let her pull a stunt like this again.

But just this once...

He supposed he could let it pass.

The next morning, Mal’s interactions were mechanical. He’d woken up before the usual exercise time with Philo. Instead, he pulled up his chair and opened up a drawer with several papers arranged along inside. He took off the top layer of papers, revealing the middle layer.

Pages with the encoded information on the Absolute Barrier spell.

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