L*st and Death

“There’s no winning or losing here. You picked the wrong person to fight with. That stuff about me dating someone... it was a lie.”

Siron’s voice, which had been shouting at Baek Kyung in desperation, gradually faded to a whisper.

Baek Kyung looked down at Siron with arrogant satisfaction, as if he had known all along.

“I’m not here to fight. I’ve got something to talk about, so sit tight and wait.”

“What the hell would you have to talk about with a doctor?”

“Urology consultation. No joke—this guy’s really got some problems down there.”

Baek Kyung grabbed the thing hanging heavily between his legs and gave it a firm shake. Turning his back to Siron, who grimaced and looked away in disgust, Baek Kyung reached for the examination room door as if it were his own clinic.

“Dr. Johnson. Let’s go in.”

“I’d advise against going in there,” came Johnson’s raspy voice, irritated and clearly unwelcoming.

“Hmph. I promise not to be surprised, no matter what I see.”

Without waiting for permission, Baek Kyung opened the door and walked into the exam room. When Siron tried to follow him in, Johnson caught him by the wrist and shook his head.

“I’m curious what he thinks he’s going to say.”

“B-but still...”

With a smile, Johnson gripped Siron’s shoulder and said,

“Whatever your circumstances are, I’m sorry I couldn’t play the boyfriend role more convincingly.”

“N-no. Really, it’s fine. I was being rude.”

“Hmm. Maybe it’s because you weren’t shameless enough that you missed your chance.”

He gave Siron’s shoulder a gentle pat. The touch felt precariously intimate. A missed chance? Siron blinked in confusion, and Johnson, eyeing him carefully, asked,

“Your skin’s red. Is it very itchy?”

“Ah... it’s kind of prickly. Maybe an allergy? It’s been like this since evening. No idea why.”

It felt like hives spreading across his entire body. Not just the skin—his insides, genitals, even the area around his anus were crawling with irritating, stinging sensations.

“I’ll take a look in a bit.”

Despite the unexpected late-night visit, Johnson showed no sign of annoyance and calmly retreated into the exam room, closing the door behind him.

Siron stood frozen, hyper-aware of where Johnson had touched him, unsettled by the lingering feeling of the man’s pale-eyed gaze. Snapping out of it, he tiptoed up to the door where the two men had disappeared. Even with his ear pressed tightly to the surface, he couldn’t hear a thing.

“What the hell? Can’t hear a word.”

“Hey.”

Siron flinched at the voice behind him. He’d completely forgotten about the man—the reason they had come to see Dr. Johnson in the first place.

“Where is this place?”

“...A hospital.”

“Hospital?”

The man’s swollen face twisted in confusion.

“You mean... like an alpha factory?”

Siron gave a short, disbelieving laugh.

“Huh? Alpha... car factory? This is just a normal urology clinic. You hit your head, so I brought you here.”

“A urology clinic for a head injury?”

“Judging by how you’re talking, you seem fine now. Wanna start with a chemical castration treatment?”

Siron stared at the man’s still-rigid erection with disgust as he made the jab.

“I mean, even I think this guy’s unfamiliar to me, but castration’s a bit...”

The man trailed off, unable to finish. Siron could feel him desperately trying to think his way out of the situation. But after all that brainwork, the man opened his mouth and spoke in an utterly clueless, shameless tone.

“Can you untie me?”

Siron felt his reason shoot off into another galaxy.

“What? Untie you?”

“Yeah. My hands and feet are cramping up—can’t you do something?”

The man who had tried to rape him just minutes ago was now casually asking to be untied with zero remorse. And that voice—clear and annoyingly youthful despite the damage—was really starting to get on Siron’s nerves. That rough, raspy tone still managed to sound weirdly familiar, and it made Siron’s mouth go dry.

“Am I insane? No way.”

“Why not?”

“Why not? You literally just tried to r—rape me.”

“...Me? Are you saying I did that?”

The man looked genuinely shocked, like he couldn’t believe it. Was he seriously brain-damaged? Siron began to question if this guy was even capable of basic thought.

“Yes. You. You did.”

The man’s jaw dropped in astonishment.

“Wow, I really fucked up, huh?”

Like some idiot who’d just rear-ended a car, the violent rapist who had ripped the door off a business now sat there dumbfounded, saying that like it was a fender-bender.

One psycho wasn’t enough—now he had a brain-dead moron too. Siron was surrounded by lunatics. Rage welled up inside him, and he gasped as he frantically looked around. His legs were shaking so badly he needed to hold on to something. But there was nothing suitable, so he had to brace himself against the wall.

“Sorry, but I don’t remember any of that... I think I was trying to eat some curry.”

“Curry? And you switched the menu to me instead?”

“How far did I... eat you?”

Siron was speechless. He glared at the man, imagining smashing his skull with a cast-iron frying pan. The man, clearly frightened by the disgust twisted across Siron’s face, rushed to defend himself.

“I didn’t do it on purpose. I swear I didn’t mean to.”

“You’re mistaken. You didn’t manage to eat me.”

“Oh, thank god.”

“Thank god? Thank god?! You fucking bastard had my pants off and you’re saying thank god?”

“It wasn’t on purpose! I—I’m not a bad person, really. I swear it. On my career as an actor!”

“...What? You call yourself an actor?”

At Siron’s scornful sneer, the man looked pained, his swollen face crumpling.

“Yeah... I guess you wouldn’t know me. I’m not that famous yet.”

“Even unknown actors don’t live like that.”

“I really do feel sorry. Can’t you trust me just this once? I tried to go through my rut somewhere safe.”

“Rut? What the hell’s that? What kind of new bullshit is that?”

His bloodstained face twisted in disbelief. Grunting, the man shifted his bound body and tried to sit up, straining against the zip ties on his wrists. But even with the strength to rip a metal door, they didn’t break easily. After struggling and panting for a while, he gave up and slumped back down.

“You seriously don’t know what a rut cycle is? Aren’t the guys around you alphas?”

“What even is that?”

“You don’t know?”

“No. I don’t. What the hell is it? Alpha male? Like some kind of top dog crap?”

“...Something like that.”

Suddenly, the man looked like he’d said too much and clammed up.

Siron found it harder and harder to tolerate this conversation. They kept throwing around words like ‘alpha’ and ‘rut’ like it was common knowledge, yet left him completely out of the loop.

Do I look like someone who can’t fight back? They're the ones who look stupid. Or is this like some global trivia I missed? Is my ignorance why they’re excluding me from the conversation?

He realized... maybe that really was the case. Feeling his self-esteem vanish like sand slipping through his fingers, he was about to discreetly search ‘alpha’ and ‘rut’ on his phone when he noticed the man’s injured foot. The deep cut Dr. Johnson had made earlier.

But now, the bleeding had stopped, and the flesh had darkened like it was starting to scab over—as if the wound had already begun to seal itself.

Would’ve been better if Johnson had sliced deep enough to show bone. Siron sneered internally.

“Weren’t you bleeding just now? Maybe it looked worse than it was.”

“When did I even get this cut?”

The man looked at the wound like it was someone else’s body.

“You did that to yourself while freaking out.”

At Siron’s annoyed tone, the man rolled his eyes toward the ceiling.

“Me?”

“Yeah.”

Siron lied without hesitation. The man didn’t question it for a second and accepted it with a dazed nod.

“Guess it’s my only redeeming feature? My body heals freakishly fast, like a monster.”

Like a monster? Siron couldn’t make sense of anything this guy said. He had no interest in trying anymore, but then the man asked seriously:

“Okay, let’s say I’m a monster. Then what are you...? What are you supposed to be?”

“Me?”

“I can smell pheromones from you too.”

The man stared openly at Siron’s face, eyes glazed, almost entranced.

Even if a lion could talk, we wouldn’t understand it. Because we live in completely different worlds with completely different assumptions. This man spoke Korean, but it was like he came from another dimension—spouting utter nonsense. Maps

“Ugh, never mind.”

Giving up on the sad lion, Siron turned back and pressed his ear to the exam room door again.

Still nothing. At least they weren’t brawling. Which meant Baek Kyung was either managing a surprisingly sane conversation... or actually receiving a real consultation.

Maybe he really did catch an STD after all that whoring around. Thinking of the guy who once acted like a soulmate now screwing around with others filled Siron with fresh betrayal. Even though he was the one who ran away from home, he still felt like a stray dog abandoned by its owner. That fear stabbed at his chest.

Get it together, Yoon Siron. That bastard isn’t your owner. He’s not even a goddamn dog-catcher.

Stray dogs never get caught by dog-catchers. Resolved once again, Siron made his decision. This was his chance. He had to escape.

He opened the Uber app. Of course, he did feel bad for Johnson. Not only had he barged in at night, but he was about to dump both Baek Kyung and a would-be rapist on the guy and run off. But any man who carried metal zip ties and a jackknife was probably fine handling whatever kind of shit Baek Kyung pulled.

Run now, apologize later.

Sorry. Just clean it up this once.

Siron muttered an internal apology and checked his phone. Luckily, there was a nearby driver on the map. Once matched, he quietly stepped away from the door.

“Where are you going?”

“Bathroom.”

“Liar. You’re trying to run, aren’t you?”

The man’s face turned red with effort as he tried to snap the zip ties binding his wrists. He was panting, looking at Siron with frustration. At the same time, his stiff erection suddenly twitched and wobbled side to side.

“I really like you. Can I get your number?”

The longer he stared, the more Siron’s skin crawled. It was like a danger alarm went off—his whole body went taut. Every time the man inhaled with those quick, desperate breaths, it felt like the air around Siron thinned.

“No. You’ll never see me again.”

Fucking rapist saying shit like that. With a sharp, mocking tone, Siron fired the line and left the clinic without looking back.

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