Mahabharat: Shiva's Last Variable

(A/N):

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Narada had finally reached the point where he could no longer keep pretending that running away would somehow make the problem disappear.

He had travelled from Indra Lok to Vaikuntha, the very place where he usually came whenever he wanted an answer to something that even his own considerable knowledge could not explain.

Yet the strange young woman had followed him all the way here,

And now she was standing inside Vaikuntha itself, calmly calling him her father while he was still trying to understand how such a thing could possibly be true.

He turned toward Vishnu with an almost desperate expression.

"Prabhu, please explain this to me properly. I have spent the entire day trying to understand what is happening, and every answer I get only gives me another question."

"I am a Brahmachari."

"I have never married, I have never had children, and I have spent my entire life travelling from one place to another. Then how can this young woman suddenly appear and tell everyone that I am her father?"

Vishnu, who had been listening to Narada’s increasingly frustrated questions with a quiet smile, finally let out a small chuckle.

"Narada, you are making one assumption that is causing all this confusion."

Narada frowned hearing Lord Vishnu.

"What assumption?"

"That the only way for someone to become a father is through marriage and the ordinary process of having a child."

Narada stared at him.

"But isn’t that the most obvious way?"

"It is certainly one way,"

Vishnu replied,

"but it is hardly the only way creation has produced children throughout history. You have lived long enough to know that yourself."

"There have been beings born from blessings, divine energy, spiritual essence, sacred objects, mantras, boons and even from circumstances that would sound impossible if you tried explaining them to someone who had never witnessed such things."

Narada opened his mouth to argue, then stopped.

Vishnu continued before he could interrupt.

"So why are you so determined to reject the possibility simply because you have never married?"

Narada looked toward the young woman.

She was standing quietly a short distance away, watching the conversation with an expression that suggested she had already known where it was going.

"I understand that, Prabhu,"

Narada finally said,

"but that still doesn’t answer my question. I understand that a person can become a father without marriage. What I don’t understand is how I became her father."

"When did it happen? How did it happen? Where was I when she was born? I don’t even remember anything remotely resembling this."

Vishnu smiled.

"Because she was not born in the way you are imagining."

Narada’s eyebrows rose.

"Then how was she born?"

Vishnu leaned slightly against Sheshnag and looked at him with a knowing expression.

"She was born from something you have accumulated throughout your own existence."

Narada became silent.

"What have I accumulated?"

"Your karma."

Narada blinked caught off gaurd.

"My karma?"

Vishnu nodded his head.

"Your life has been far more eventful than you like to admit."

"You have travelled through countless realms, spoken to kings and sages, interfered in situations that perhaps would have been simpler if you had stayed away, carried information from one person to another, revealed secrets, created arguments, settled arguments, started new arguments immediately after settling the previous ones,

And somehow managed to leave a little piece of yourself behind in almost every situation."

Lakshmi covered her smile.

Narada glanced at her.

"Devi, please don’t encourage him."

Lakshmi simply smiled.

Vishnu continued, clearly enjoying the sage’s discomfort.

"All those actions created karma. Not necessarily good or bad karma in the simple sense, but countless impressions and consequences that gradually became connected with your spiritual essence."

"Over an unimaginably long period, those accumulated karmic energies reached a point where they could sustain something more than a mere consequence."

Narada slowly began to understand.

"You mean..."

"Yes."

Vishnu nodded his head as he revealed the answer for Naradha’s question.

"She came into existence from that accumulated essence."

Narada turned toward the young woman again.

"So she was literally born from my karma?"

"From the essence created by it,"

Lord Vishnu corrected him.

"She isn’t simply a collection of your deeds walking around in human form. The accumulated essence became the foundation for her existence, and creation itself provided her with an identity and a life of her own."

Narada remained quiet for several moments.

There was still one thing he couldn’t understand.

"If she was created from my essence, then why did I never know about her?"

"Because she was not immediately awake."

Narada looked back at Vishnu.

"What do you mean?"

"She remained in a deep spiritual sleep for a long time. Her existence was there, but she had not yet entered the world in the manner you understand. She was waiting for the proper moment for her consciousness to awaken."

Narada’s expression slowly changed.

"Then how does she know me?"

Vishnu smiled.

"That is the interesting part."

Narada already suspected he wasn’t going to like the answer.

"While she remained in that state, she was still capable of perceiving the world through her Drishti."

"She could see what was happening around you, and because you were the source from which her essence had emerged, she was naturally drawn toward you."

Narada stared at the young woman.

"You mean she has been watching me?"

"Yes."

"How long?"

Vishnu chuckled looking at sage Naradha’s face.

"Long enough."

Narada’s face slowly fell.

"What exactly did she see?"

Vishnu’s smile became wider.

"Everything."

Narada immediately looked uncomfortable.

"Everything?"

"Your travels. Your conversations. Your encounters with sages. Your visits to different kingdoms. The countless times you carried someone’s secret to another person."

"The arguments you became involved in. The occasions when you deliberately provoked someone simply because you wanted to see what would happen."

Narada raised a finger.

"I don’t deliberately provoke people."

Lakshmi looked at him.

Narada paused for a second.

"...Not always."

Vishnu laughed.

The young woman finally spoke from where she was standing.

"I have seen enough to know exactly what kind of person my father is."

Narada turned toward her.

"You have been watching all this time?"

She nodded her head like a good girl.

"Yes."

"And you still decided you wanted me as your father?"

She smiled hearing his question.

"Of course father."

Narada looked genuinely confused by that answer.

"After seeing everything?"

"Especially after seeing everything."

For once, Narada had no immediate reply.

Vishnu watched the exchange with an amused expression before continuing.

"She wasn’t born from a woman, Narada. She wasn’t the result of you abandoning your Brahmacharyam, nor did you secretly marry someone and forget about it."

Narada immediately looked relieved.

Vishnu chuckled enjoying the expression on Naradha’s face.

"But she is still your daughter."

Narada’s relief disappeared.

"Prabhu..."

"She was created from your spiritual essence, shaped by the karma you gathered throughout your existence, and given life when the conditions became right."

"That makes the connection between you quite real, whether you were prepared for it or not."

Narada looked at the young woman again.

She was smiling at him.

He slowly rubbed his forehead.

"So all this time, when I kept telling her she had mistaken me for someone else..."

"You were denying something that was actually true."

Narada sighed deeply.

"I see."

There was a long silence.

Then Narada looked at Vishnu with a wounded expression.

"Why didn’t you tell me this when I first arrived?"

Vishnu gave him an innocent smile.

"You didn’t ask."

Narada stared at him.

"I came here specifically because I needed an explanation!"

"You spent most of the time explaining to me why you couldn’t possibly be her father."

Narada opened his mouth.

Closed it. Opened it again. Then finally gave up.

"Narayan..."

Lakshmi couldn’t hold back her laughter anymore.

Even Vishnu laughed openly.

Narada looked at both of them, completely resigned to the fact that whatever peace he had enjoyed as a lifelong Brahmachari had apparently come to an end.

And the young woman standing nearby?

She simply smiled.

After all, she had finally found her father.

For perhaps the first time since the young woman had appeared in his life, Sage Narada finally stopped arguing with the situation.

There was no point denying it anymore.

Lord Vishnu had explained everything, and although the entire story was so unusual that Narada still needed time to properly digest it, he could no longer claim that the young woman had simply mistaken him for someone else.

She really was connected to him.

She had been born from the spiritual essence that had accumulated through his countless actions and experiences, and she had spent much of her existence watching him through her Drishti before finally awakening and entering the world.

Narada looked at her for a long moment.

The young woman was still waiting patiently.

"So..."

Narada finally said, letting out a long sigh,

"I suppose there is no point in running anymore."

She smiled.

"I told you that from the beginning."

Narada shook his head.

"You could have explained all this instead of chasing me across half the realms."

"You wouldn’t have believed me."

Narada paused.

"...That is unfortunately true."

From behind them, Vishnu laughed softly.

Narada turned back toward his Lord and folded his hands.

"Prabhu, whatever the circumstances, I thank you for explaining everything to me. If I had continued trying to understand this on my own, I probably would have travelled to every realm in creation before accepting the truth."

Vishnu smiled hearing him.

"Knowing you, you probably would have."

Lakshmi looked at the young woman and then at Narada.

"Now that you have accepted her, there is one thing you should probably think about."

Narada frowned hearing it.

"What? Devi..."

"Where is she going to live?"

Narada went silent.

"...."

That question had somehow escaped him completely.

He glanced at the young woman.

Then at the enormous divine realm surrounding them.

Then back at Lakshmi.

"That is..."

He paused.

"...a problem."

Narada didn’t actually have a home.

His life had never been tied to one place. He travelled constantly between Bhulok, Devalok, Indra Lok, Vaikuntha and countless other realms, appearing wherever his presence was needed or wherever his curiosity happened to take him.

There was another reason for it as well.

The curse he carried prevented him from remaining in one place for too long.

Even when he wanted to settle somewhere peacefully, circumstances would eventually force him to move again.

His existence had become one long journey between realms.

He couldn’t simply tell his newly discovered daughter,

"Come live with me,"

because even he didn’t know where he would be tomorrow.

Narada rubbed his forehead.

"I don’t have a house."

The young woman looked at him.

"I don’t need a house."

Narada stared at her.

"That’s easy to say now."

"I can travel with you."

Narada’s expression became even more complicated.

"You know I travel constantly?"

She nodded.

"I’ve been watching you."

"Right."

Narada sighed rubbing his fore head.

"Of course you have."

He turned toward Vishnu once more.

"Prabhu, I suppose this means she will have to travel with me."

Vishnu smiled.

"Perhaps that is precisely what was meant to happen."

Narada didn’t entirely like that answer, but he had already learned that arguing with Vishnu rarely produced the result he wanted.

He bowed deeply.

"Then I shall take my leave."

Vishnu raised his hand in blessing.

"Go safely, Narada."

Lakshmi smiled at them.

"And take care of your daughter."

Narada paused.

He looked at the young woman standing beside him.

Then, after a moment, he nodded.

"I will."

The two of them finally left the inner chambers of Vaikuntha and walked toward the gates.

For the first time, Narada wasn’t walking alone.

He had spent ages travelling from realm to realm by himself, carrying his veena, his stories and his endless stream of questions.

Now there was someone walking beside him.

As they passed through the gates of Vaikuntha, Narada glanced sideways at her.

"There is one thing I still need to know."

She looked at him.

"What father?"

"Your name."

The young woman stopped.

Narada turned toward her.

"Surely you have a name."

She shook her head.

"No."

Narada blinked caught off guard.

"No?"

"I don’t have one."

Narada stared at her for a moment.

"You travelled across realms chasing me, entered Vaikuntha and announced yourself as my daughter, but you don’t have a name?"

She gave him a small smile.

"I was never given one."

Narada rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

"That won’t do."

She tilted her head.

"Why?"

"Because I can’t spend the rest of eternity introducing you as ’my daughter who doesn’t have a name.’"

She laughed softly.

Narada smiled despite himself.

He looked toward the vast celestial road stretching ahead of them.

"Then I suppose we have another problem to solve."

"What problem?"

"Finding you a name."

The young woman smiled.

"For once, I agree with you."

Narada adjusted his veena and began walking again.

She followed beside him.

And somewhere between the end of his old solitary life and the beginning of this completely unexpected new Chapter, Sage Narada realized something rather amusing.

He had spent ages travelling through creation carrying everyone else’s stories.

Now, for the first time, he had someone beside him who would become part of his own.

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