My Clocking In System

She took my cock in her hand and looked at it the way she looked at it that first Sunday morning, like something she’d won at a fair.

"God, look at the state of you."

"Jodie, "

"No, this is my favourite bit, this. I’m having a minute."

She wrapped her fist round the base and used her mouth on the rest, and she was not gentle and she was not slow, because she’d had enough of slow for one evening.

And she kept coming off me to tell me things.

"Do you know how hard it is to sit through a dinner like that."

"Jodie, "

"I couldn’t cross my legs." Her fist twisting up over the wet at the top of me, her other hand rolling my balls slow in her palm. "I sat in that window with sauce on my wrist knowing exactly what you were going to do to me."

"That’s, "

"Say something."

"Jodie."

"Louder," she said. "That’s the rule. I’ve had to do it all night."

"Nobody in this building’s asleep anyway."

"No." She had her mouth an inch off my dick and she was extremely pleased with herself. "Not any more."

Then she took me deep and held there, and her free hand came up flat on my stomach, and my hips came off that bed without asking me first.

I made a noise I would not repeat in front of my mother.

She came off long enough to say "Better," and went straight back down.

It did not take long after that.

I told her I was close because she’d want telling, and she took me deeper and gripped the base and did not pull off, and I came in her mouth with the bed going and her hand flat on my stomach holding me down.

She stayed there through all of it.

When it stopped she came up, wiped the corner of her mouth with her thumb, and looked entirely pleased with herself.

"There," she said. "Now we’re even."

"We’re not even."

"We’re a bit even." She flopped down next to me. "And you were loud, by the way. I’ve had that noted since the first morning and tonight you’ve proved it in front of a witness."

"What witness?"

"Him next door." She waved a hand at the wall. "That’s the best blowjob I’ve ever given anybody and I’d like it minuted."

"Minuted."

"Written down. In the book." She was already dragging the sheet over. "Because I’ll not be doing that again till Tuesday, my jaw’s gone."

Afterwards she got up and did the kettle.

Naked, in a Travelodge, with the little tray and the 4 pots, filling it at the bathroom tap because there’s nowhere else to fill it.

Rrrrr, it went, and clicked, and started again.

"There’s no proper milk."

"There won’t be."

"There’s 4 of them little pots and they’re all..." She squinted at one. "This one’s for coffee. Why’s it different?"

"I don’t know."

"It says coffee on it. Why would milk be for coffee?"

"Jodie, I’ve got no idea."

"It’s a scandal, this." She got back into bed with the sheet round her, and then stopped and put a hand between her legs and made a face. "Oh, I’m going to be walking funny tomorrow."

"Sorry."

"You’re not sorry."

"I’m not sorry."

"No." She settled back against the headboard. "Do you know what I’m actually going to have to do? I’m going to have to sit through my mum’s on Sunday with my vagina in the state you’ve left it and go, no, Mum, lovely week, nothing to report." She reached for the tea. "Right. Crisps."

"What?"

"There’s a machine in the corridor. I saw it."

"You’re not going out there."

"I’m absolutely going out there."

"There’s a man out there who’s just turned his telly off."

"Then he can look at me."

She put my jumper on over nothing and went, and came back 3 minutes later with 2 packets of crisps and a Twix.

"The Twix was stuck."

"Was it."

"I had to do it twice." She got back in. "So we’ve got 2 Twixes. Well. One and a spare."

We had the crisps and the tea in the dark with the telly off and the car park light coming through the gap in the curtains where they don’t meet.

She lay on her front with her chin on her hands.

"Danny."

"Mm."

"Do you know what the actual best bit of tonight was?"

"Go on."

"Bernadette telling us it was terrible."

I laughed with a mouthful of tea.

"She was right. It was terrible."

"It was awful. There was a bit in the middle where a man looked at a photograph for about 4 minutes."

"I don’t remember any of it."

"No, well." She elbowed me. "You wouldn’t."

Down the corridor the vending machine kicked in and hummed and stopped.

"Second best," she said, "was you asking if you could come and watch me sew."

"That was a serious offer."

"I know it was. That’s why." She turned her head. "Nobody’s ever asked to watch me do anything. My mum asks how it’s going. It’s not the same thing."

"No."

"You’ll be bored senseless by Tuesday dinnertime."

"Probably."

"You’ll be sat there going, right, how many more of these."

"Six," I said. "You told me six. I’ll be counting them down."

She laughed into the pillow.

Then she went quiet in a different way, and I felt it change next to me before she said anything.

"Can I say a thing and you don’t have to answer it?"

"Go on."

"You’ve got something going on."

I didn’t say anything.

"I’m not asking what it is." She was talking to the pillow. "I said that on the pavement and I meant it. But I’ve got eyes, Danny. You go somewhere in your head about twice an evening, and you come back, and you’re fine, and you think I’ve not clocked it."

"Jodie."

"You went there in that restaurant when I was on about photos. And you’ve gone there just now."

The kettle clicked off in the corner, about 4 minutes late.

"I’m not going to ask you. I want that on the record." Her voice had gone very flat and very level. "I’m not asking, I’m not going to look, and I’m not going to be one of them women who goes through a coat."

"I know you’re not."

"But at some point you’re going to want to tell somebody. And when you do, I’d like it to be me."

She said it into a pillow in a £59 room with crisp packets on the duvet.

"Yeah," I said.

"That’s not a yes."

"It’s a yes."

"Right." She shuffled down and got her head on my chest and one leg over both of mine. "Turn that lamp off. I’m going."

She was out in about 6 minutes.

I lay there with her hair in my face and her arm across me and the car park light coming through the curtains, and down the corridor a fire door went and somebody laughed at something.

Then the phone lit the ceiling.

I’d left it face down on the bedside table with the paper wallet and the room card, and it came up gold and stayed there, and I had to get my arm out from under her to reach it.

[ Clocked on, 23:52. Clocked off, 01:14. ] [ Grade 1. ]

I read it twice.

Grade 1.

That’s the one it told me about on Saturday morning. That’s a room that would let you in already.

My thumb was already moving.

what does it pay

[ A door that would have let anybody in pays nothing, host. ]

I lay there in the dark with £59 of room round me and a woman asleep on my chest and a machine telling me what the best night of my life was worth.

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