"Helga, you need to stay behind." Andre’s fingers squeezed tightly around Helga’s hands. At a loss, the valkyrie stared at him, bewildered by the sudden change in her husband’s demeanor. "The king’s a fool, and we both know that. Why do you insist on accompanying me? He only wants a scapegoat to pin his failure, and I would be amiss to take you."
Sliding her hand out of his grip, Helga narrowed her eyebrows and stepped closer to her husband. Reaching for his cheek, she brushed a lock of his curly hair behind his ear and smiled instead of getting upset.
"It’s just a small battalion, Andre; I can handle them. Besides, I get to be close to you and ensure that you’re safe."
"What about our daughters? You’re gonna leave them here alone?"
"The dog’s gonna be with them, and I’m gonna arrange something with Markus; I’m sure he’ll be happy to help."
"The knight and a dog..."
Andre’s shoulders dropped in defeat upon hearing Helga’s plan. The valkyrie hadn’t fought a fly for longer than most kingdoms now stood erected. Her perception of danger was awfully skewed, but no matter what he tried, he could not for the life of him make her realize that the soldiers in the battalion and themselves were not the same as the soldiers of the holy war who could stand toe to toe against lesser gods and their underlings.
"You should stay here," Andre asserted.
"Why?" She asked, furrowing her brows.
"Because I know you’re going to be distracted. The only reason you even wanna come is to keep an eye on me; you think I will die without you out there, don’t you? But what if your hyperfixation on my safety costs us the lives of everyone else?"
"Andre, I fought–"
"Gods, I know." Grunting at her, Andre closed his eyes and turned around. Rubbing his temples, he tried to glance past her apparent arrogance. "That was a thousand years ago, and you haven’t fought anything beyond the local monsters since."
Grabbing him by the shoulder, Helga forced him to turn around with a jerk.
"And what makes a keeper any different? I can handle this alright! Just trust me, I’ve done this a thousand times before."
"But you’re not the person you used to be, Helga. You’re not the monster who killed without mercy, and that’s why I’m scared that you will hesitate when it’s time to choose between me, our daughters, or anyone else."
"Nonsense, I’ve been through it all, Andre. I just wanna be close to you for this one mission, okay?" Helga’s smile wavered quite a bit as her husband stared right through her facade. Her willingness to accompany was a poison of its own, not because she was arrogant but rather.
"You’re too scared, Helga. You can try to hide it, but I can see past this pretense of yours. I love you, but your fear of losing me or even our daughters, every time...I just see you freeze up at that thought. So what can I expect when you see me pinned by a monster? I know the answer, and I’m sure you do too. And that record of yours? You didn’t have anyone to lose back then, but now you do, so stay behind and look after our girls."
"You’re overthinking again."
"And what if I am? At least one of us needs to stay behind regardless."
"Then you stay, and I’ll go deal with the keeper."
"You know I can’t do that."
"Why can’t you?"
"These are my men, Helga. I trained them, and they will follow me. I have a duty to bring them home to their families alive, the same way I have a duty to come back to you and our family. But I can’t promise everyone safety if one of us is distracted. These men...they respect you and the king knows they do. Death is inevitable in this mission, and that old bastard knows it too."
"You wanna take the blame when someone dies?" Clicking her tongue, Helga waved dismissively at him. "Why can’t we do that together then? Someone is gonna die regardless, after all."
"You’re being unreasonable." Grabbing his gear off the edge of the bed, Andre waved a hand over his head, masking his dragonic horns. Then, as his eyes met Helga again, he gestured her to the side. "Take care of our daughter until I come back."
As he passed her, Helga grabbed his hand and squeezed.
"No," she whispered.
"Helga, I’ve already decided," Andre replied with an icy glance.
"You should listen to your elders sometimes."
"Again with the age? Only reminded of it when it suits your end of the argument."
Jerking his hand out of her grip, he slid his hands inside of his coat’s pockets. Standing still while his woman stared at him from the side, Andre’s expression twisted, and his head turned about randomly with abrupt jerks here and there.
"If something happens, you’ll keep a clear head." Opening his eyes, he heaved while looking at her again. "And do not freeze up, not like at the twins’ birth. I thought you’d die when they didn’t cry at first..."
"I was in shock, but that’s different." Moving closer, Helga caressed Andre’s cheek again. "It was my first time giving birth, but I’ve fought for longer than you’ve been alive, dear. I will be fine, and with me with you, I’ll make sure that you’re safe."
Wrapping her arms around him, the valkyrie hugged the first whom she ever loved. Tight as a vice and warm and fuzzy, a far cry from who she used to be. And even as Andre hugged her back, he saw a future that Helga never did.
Now, as she lies alone in her room, Helga Andre Valkaria buried her face into a pillow with tears staining its cover. Seeing the mirage of her daughter’s injured form brought back bitter memories and the greatest mistake she’d made in forever. Andre was right; after growing bitter from the war and then being loved more than ever, she had known what must be done, but her bonds with others had crippled her without injury.
"Stupid fucking thing you two did..." She grunted, her face still buried in the pillow while her two daughters sat at the edge of her bed.
"M-mom, we’re sorry. We didn’t think–"
"I’m sorry..." Cutting them off, the valkyrie cried some more. Apologizing not to her daughters, but to her long-dead husband, for she had broken her promise and frozen once more.
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