It started with a knock on our door the day before my fifth birthday. Mom answered the door and immediately stepped outside while I played with my big sister, Anais. She and my big brothers Malcolm and Avery were older teenagers, so they all treated me like I was their baby too.
“Come on, Sarah, let’s go upstairs.” Anias tried to tug me away from the living room. I was too busy listening to mom and the man she was arguing with. I was too heavy for my age, though I carried it well. Meaning if I didn’t want to move, I wouldn’t.
“Michelle, calm down.” Something about his voice sounded so familiar. Listening to him made my backside and my tailbone itch. This was before I gained my wings, or horns and tail.
“Calm down?” She hissed. “I am calm, Bayani. I’m calmly giving you 5 seconds to get off my property before I shoot your ass." The sound of something metallic clicking frightened me. It was too close to my mother.
What I couldn’t see at the time was her taking the safety off her gun.
It’s not that they were talking loudly; it’s just that I could hear exceedingly well.
“Momma?” I whispered. “She’s mad at him.” I pointed at the space the man stood . Anias shook her head, trying to move me still.
“Hey, didn’t you want me to do your hair?” She got me there. I desperately wanted my hair in the big afro puffs that I’d seen on tv. “I can’t do your hair down here, girl!” She whispered with a smile. But that smile didn’t hide her distress.
But something didn’t sit right with me, and I was a nosy little kid, so I went outside to investigate.The first thing that hit me was his scent; he had one like mine. The second was the way he looked at me, like I was the prize he’d been hunting for.
“Sarah! Go back in the house, baby.” Momma stood in front of me, but the man peeked his head around her, smiling at me. Then he reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of paper.
Mom snatched it, and just like that, the wind left her sails. After she read it, she glanced at me, glared at him, and then holstered her gun.
“You gonna tell her? You or me, I don't mind either way.”
“Tell me what?” I asked, tilting my head up at him.
“Sarah.” He got on one knee, getting eye level. His voice was warm, but I still didn’t trust him. “Sarah, I’m your father. My name is Bayani Jimenez.”
My nose wrinkled, and my mouth curled up in disgust. “No. My daddy is at work. His name is Allen.”
His smile faltered only slightly. Shaking his head, he tried to reach out and touch my shoulder, but I didn’t let him. I backed up and my mother stepped in front of me.
“Listen. Sarah, when you were born, I was in a bad place mentally. I was confused, afraid…” a crack in his mask; he frowns and his face now looks like a man who’s had too many sleepless nights.
“Bayani is your father, baby girl,the problem is that he left us when you were born and he wanted nothing to do with us until now.” She squints at him, trusting him as far as she could throw him…which with her frame, isn’t very far.
“That paper in your mother's hands says she has to let me see you now. Even if she’s mad at me still.” He put his hand over his heart. “I know I messed up badly, but I promise you I’m better now and I’m ready to be your dad…if you’ll let me.”
At the time, his smile was sincere to me and full of regret. Five-year-old me still loved my dad, Allen, but a second dad? A chance to help heal him? How could I say no to that?
My hug was all the answer he needed.
“Can we stop here?”
“No.” Mnemosyne says, shaking her head with a sad smile.
“This is torture.” I lamented. Reliving this was the last thing I wanted to do.
“My favorite part happens next.” Of course he’d say that.
His voice snapped me out of my funk. The vision of my biological father sat smugly in his judge chair. If I had my way, he wouldn’t be sitting like that for long. I can’t believe I let him in my life.
“We’re right behind you, angel.” I smiled, hearing Guy's words warmed my heart.
“Don’t let him get to you goddess. He’s not even real.” Noa was right, there was no point working myself up over his presence.
Just when my stomach started feeling woozy without Wyatt’s input, the bubble moved slightly. He was right behind me, sending me all the support he could.
“You’ve got this, princess. Besides, remember what happens next?” His soft chuckle made me roll my eyes but he was right.
I turned to Mnemosyne, nodding. “Okay, go ahead.”
Bayani’s scowl gave me the confidence boost I needed to get through this.
Mnemosyne’s mouth twitched ever so slightly. I wonder if she couldn’t show how she felt about the situation.
“We proceed.” She announced. The scene moved yet again.
Air whipped all around my hair as the helicopter carried us over Kīlauea, a slightly active volcano in Hawaii. It hadn’t erupted yet but scientists suggested it was only a matter of a decade or two before it started erupting regularly.
The scientists didn’t count on me.
“Dad! What is all that stuff?” I pointed down at the volcanoes sea of orange-red lava that caught my attention.
“That, my dear, is lava! Molten liquid rock that’s broken through the earth's surface and hot as heck.” he smiled as he taught me a small geology lesson. In my little eyes, he was the smartest man in the world and he took me on vacation!
I oo’d and aww’d, leaning my head out of the doorway just a bit.
“Careful my dear, I’d hate for anything bad to happen to you.” Bayani’s voice was right in my ear and far away at the same time. I should have known something would happen but I was blissfully unaware as two things happened at once:
The helicopter experienced turbulence, making it hard for me to grip anything safely. But I managed though.
That did little to prepare me for the donkey kick to my ass that sent me hurtling to lava below.
The only thing I thought of on the way down was that my mom was right.
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