"Well, little warlock. Back again so soon?"
Within the Felscar Rift, the six-armed demon Agatha lounged lazily across her oversized bed, watching Evenson with an amused smile.
Evenson stood beside it and sighed.
"I’ve had a spectacular run of bad luck."
He wasn’t exaggerating.
The vintage car he’d squeezed out of S.H.I.E.L.D. as compensation had only been driven once before it landed him in police custody. Then, almost immediately afterward, it had been smashed to pieces during the chaos.
There was no way he was going to abandon it.
Unfortunately, the vehicle wasn’t just any classic.
It had been Red Skull’s personal Hydra staff car, almost certainly custom-built decades ago. Even if some forgotten manufacturer had originally assembled it, sixty years had passed.
The warranty was, to put it mildly, no longer valid.
Sending it back to the factory wasn’t an option.
Even if someone agreed to restore it, the estimate would almost certainly exceed the value of his house.
As for General Ross’s promise that "the appropriate government department" would compensate him...
Evenson figured he’d be lucky to receive the check before retirement.
Nick Fury hadn’t helped either.
The Director refused to classify the damage as an operational expense.
S.H.I.E.L.D. had a budget measured in billions, yet somehow reimbursing one destroyed car was apparently asking too much.
In the end, Evenson reached the only conclusion he trusted.
If everyone else was useless...
He’d fix it himself.
He treated the entire project as an excuse to level up his Engineering skills.
After an impressive display of shameless pleading in Agent Melinda May’s office, he’d finally convinced her, or perhaps simply exhausted her, into approving an advance on an entire year’s salary.
With the money secured, he purchased everything he needed.
Then came a solid week of hammering.
Day after day.
The neighbors filed five separate noise complaints.
By the end of it, the restoration was... mostly complete.
The body had been repaired.
The headlights replaced.
The wheels rebuilt.
The seats restored.
The dashboard refinished.
Fresh paint gleamed beneath a careful polish.
From the outside, the car looked almost identical to the day it had rolled out of Hydra’s garage.
There was just one minor problem.
It didn’t have an engine.
The original supercharged V16 had been magnificent.
Terrible fuel economy aside, Evenson had loved it.
Unfortunately, reproducing one wasn’t something that could be accomplished with a forge, an anvil, and a wrench.
To manufacture an authentic replacement, he’d first have to build machine tools capable of building the engine itself.
That rabbit hole had no bottom.
The alternatives available through Azerothian Engineering weren’t much more appealing.
Goblin engineering specialized in explosions.
Gnomish engineering specialized in catastrophic optimism.
Neither inspired confidence when installed beneath the hood of a vehicle you intended to drive.
Besides, those engines were absurd.
They looked like they displaced thirty liters or more, belched smoke like industrial factories, and would probably be pulled over for violating emissions standards before reaching the end of the block.
Evenson had been debating whether to steal the engine from a hot dog cart or simply sign away the next five years of his life working for S.H.I.E.L.D. to pay for a proper replacement...
When inspiration struck.
Legion technology.
Soul-powered engines.
High output.
No gasoline.
Zero emissions.
Environmentally friendly.
The perfect solution.
Naturally, convinced he was a genius, Evenson waited until nightfall and once again projected his consciousness into the Twisting Nether.
True, he wasn’t exactly wealthy.
Not in the real world.
Not in the Nether either.
But compared to his usual financial situation...
Things had improved considerably.
The battle between Hulk and Abomination had claimed plenty of lives.
By arriving afterward and harvesting the lingering souls, he’d collected well over two hundred soul crystals.
Inside the Felscar Rift, at least, that qualified him as someone with spending money.
Agatha stretched languidly, propping herself up on one elbow.
"How did your last transaction with the Overlord go?"
Evenson thought back.
"Pretty well."
"Everything worked exactly as advertised."
That was putting it mildly.
The deal had thrown both S.H.I.E.L.D. and Hydra into complete chaos.
Then there had been the fel-corrupted Abomination rampaging through half the city.
Agatha shifted into a more relaxed pose.
"So you’re not visiting him this time?"
Despite her towering height and six arms, there was an effortless elegance to the way she moved.
"I’ll pass."
Evenson shamelessly appreciated the view for a second before answering.
"I don’t particularly like the Overlord."
He said it without lowering his voice.
"He’s crude."
"Arrogant."
"Rude."
"And not nearly as clever as he thinks he is."
To be fair, that description fit most Pit Lords.
They weren’t stupid.
They simply considered thinking optional.
Agatha slowly sat upright.
Her golden eyes narrowed.
One fingertip traced the edge of the massive curved blade resting beside her bed.
"Careful, little warlock."
"You are criticizing my commander... to his own adjutant."
Evenson met her gaze without blinking.
"So?"
"Are you planning to kill me to defend his honor?"
Agatha held the stare for several seconds.
Then she smiled.
"...No."
"We’ve done enough business together."
"I’ll let it slide."
Her voice remained playful.
Her eyes, however, betrayed the faintest flicker of irritation.
Not because he’d insulted the Overlord.
Because he’d referred to him as her commander.
Among the Shivarra, the elegant demon matriarchs who prized cunning above brute strength, relations with the Pit Lords had never been particularly warm.
On that subject, she and Evenson shared remarkably similar opinions.
"Since you’re not here to see him..."
She reclined once more.
Notably, this time she omitted the respectful title she’d previously attached to the Overlord.
"...then you’re here for me."
"That’s one way to put it."
Agatha sighed dramatically.
"For one glorious moment, after you dealt directly with the Overlord, I thought you’d finally started thinking bigger."
She shook her head.
"Clearly I overestimated you."
Evenson grinned.
"Nothing wrong with having multiple business partners."
"Hm."
She waved one hand lazily toward the far side of the chamber.
"What you came for is over there."
"Help yourself."
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