Sorcerer in the Marvel Universe

Now that was confidence.

Evenson had to admire the sheer audacity of the Eredar Twins. Former senior commanders of the Burning Legion really did operate on a different scale.

Most people booked a taxi.

These two were trying to charter a fel-powered warship.

Wait.

A frown crossed Evenson’s face.

"Hold on. Are you two planning to run for it?"

"Don’t worry," Salora assured him. "There’s plenty of room on a fel-powered warship. We can take you with us."

She paused and glanced toward Gule, who was still unconscious nearby.

"Of course, we’ll need him to supply us with another batch of... provisions first. We can ration them along the way."

Evenson’s smile became painfully artificial.

"How thoughtful. You’re even planning to bring me and the laundry detergent."

Then he suddenly raised his voice.

"But why does hearing the word ’Naaru’ immediately make you two want to flee the planet? And since when am I not the one responsible for running away?"

"You have no idea how disgusting those giant lights are..."

Salora’s face twisted with genuine disgust.

"Damn it!"

Aureseus suddenly roared and hurled her phone onto the floor.

She stomped on it with her hoof until the device shattered.

Seeing both of them staring at her, she took a breath and forced herself to calm down.

"Every fel-powered warship stationed at the Felfire Rift was pulled away when the front moved. There isn’t a single one left."

She stamped her hoof against the ground again.

"We still have a few ship engines in storage, but we can’t exactly fly through space sitting on an engine."

Her expression darkened.

"And the only scientist we have who actually knows how to build a fel-powered warship is currently here."

"I was just going to..."

"Why don’t we send Gnos back and have him build one?"

Salora immediately seized on the idea.

Evenson tried again.

"I wanted to say..."

"Build one by hand?" Aureseus shot back. "How long do you think that would take?"

She dismissed the suggestion immediately.

Salora frowned for a moment before producing another idea.

"Then perhaps we could attempt a random long-range teleportation."

She hesitated.

"But we probably wouldn’t be able to bring much of our supplies with us. Life would become incredibly boring."

"Ladies, please let me finish one sentence."

"Don’t worry."

Salora waved him off impatiently.

"With our magical knowledge, we can avoid stars and other worlds that are completely unsuitable for life. Everything else should be fine. Demons and warlocks aren’t exactly demanding when it comes to living conditions."

"I believe that."

Evenson had seen the worlds controlled by the Burning Legion. Calling many of them complete ecosystems would have been generous. Some barely qualified as planets at all.

Yet demons and warlocks seemed perfectly comfortable living there.

"But can you two please let me finish talking?"

"You don’t need to."

Aureseus made another grand gesture.

"Our retreat plan is flawless. We won’t leave anything behind for the Naaru to track."

"Enough!"

Evenson finally snapped.

They had interrupted him over and over again.

Did they think he was made of clay?

Both women turned toward him simultaneously, their eyes suddenly rather unfriendly.

Evenson’s confidence lasted approximately half a second.

"Well... ladies."

He immediately softened his tone.

Because apparently, men really were made of clay.

"You’re former Burning Legion commanders. The Legion and the Army of the Light have been fighting for ages, and from everything I’ve read, the Legion wasn’t exactly losing every battle."

He looked between them.

"So why does merely hearing the word ’Naaru’ make two high-ranking demons want to evacuate the planet?"

"Because that was the Legion."

Salora puffed out her cheeks.

"There were a lot of us. We had the advantage in numbers."

She gestured around the room.

"Right now, there are only two and a half of us."

Evenson stared at her.

"I’m deeply honored that you’ve decided I’m worth half a person."

Aureseus nodded solemnly.

"You should be. That’s an acknowledgment of your strength."

Her expression became completely matter-of-fact.

"If you were weaker than you are now, you wouldn’t even qualify as half a person to us."

"You’d just be cannon fodder."

"Right."

Evenson gave a dry nod.

Then he continued.

"But the Naaru aren’t exactly unstoppable. Didn’t the Blood Elves capture one once?"

The Blood Elves were a race deeply devoted to arcane magic. There had never been many elves devoted to the Light, yet they eventually produced their own Paladins.

That certainly hadn’t happened because they simply discovered faith overnight.

Kael’thas Sunstrider had captured a Naaru from the Tempest Keep and drained its Light, using that power to empower priests and warriors and forcibly create the foundation for Blood Elf Paladins.

"M’uru?"

Salora raised an eyebrow.

"We know that one."

She frowned.

"He was practically our neighbor. He lived upstairs from us."

"So..."

Evenson spread his hands.

"A group of Blood Elves managed to capture a Naaru alive and turn it into a giant Light battery."

He looked pointedly at the Twins.

"Why are two high-ranking demons like you so terrified of them?"

"We aren’t terrified!"

Aureseus shouted.

She immediately turned her face away.

"We simply..."

She struggled for an excuse.

"...wanted to go see more of the universe."

Evenson stared at her.

You couldn’t have come up with anything worse?

Even Salora couldn’t keep the performance going.

"We simply don’t like fighting Naaru."

Her voice became serious.

"And, given the choice, we don’t want to fight any powerful wielder of the Light."

She paused.

"No demon does."

"What?"

Evenson looked genuinely confused.

"Why? Do demons have some kind of built-in phobia of the Light?"

Aureseus sighed.

"Listen."

She finally explained.

"You’re a self-taught warlock. You’ve never fought a Light wielder."

"Fel energy saturates our bodies. To us, the Light is practically poison. When it hits us, it feels like someone dumped molten steel over our bodies."

Evenson remembered his own experience entering that monastery.

He had felt uncomfortable from the faintest trace of Light.

If an actual Naaru suddenly appeared in front of him, the glow alone might blind him.

"Maybe."

He nodded thoughtfully.

"But I believe Newton had a point. Force works both ways."

"If fel and the Light react that violently, then surely a Naaru would suffer when struck by fel energy too."

"Energy beings don’t feel pain."

Salora’s expression soured.

"At least, not the way we do."

Evenson understood the problem.

If two opposing forces hit each other with equal force, you’d expect both sides to suffer.

But if one side simply wasn’t wired to register pain properly, the whole exchange became horribly one-sided.

"Besides," Salora continued, her expression growing colder, "you said that Naaru came here a very long time ago."

"Who knows how much time it has had to prepare some disgusting plan?"

She glanced at Evenson.

"They may be pure in their beliefs."

Her eyes narrowed.

"That doesn’t mean they’re simple-minded."

"Actually, you don’t need to worry about that."

The Twins exchanged puzzled looks.

Evenson continued casually.

"That Naaru did come here a long time ago."

"But it didn’t stay long."

"It left to join the Army of the Light."

He paused.

"And while it was here, it apparently took God with it."

Silence.

The Twins stared at him.

Then they stared some more.

Aureseus suddenly lunged forward.

She grabbed Evenson by the collar and lifted him off the floor.

"You knew that and didn’t tell us?!"

Evenson looked completely innocent.

"I was trying to! You two kept interrupting me!"

"Important information comes first!"

Aureseus’s face was now inches from his own.

"And important information gets repeated!"

Her roar nearly shattered his eardrums.

"Fine."

Evenson calmly dug a finger into his ear.

"The Naaru already left."

He paused.

"The Naaru already left."

Another pause.

"The Naaru..."

"Enough!"

Even Salora, usually the calm and sharp-minded one, finally lost it.

She grabbed her own horns and shook them in frustration.

"You don’t have to keep saying it!"

"But you told me important things need to be repeated."

Evenson’s expression was perfectly innocent.

His eyes, however, contained the faintest glimmer of satisfaction.

That lasted until Aureseus finally exploded.

"AAARGH!"

Her fist slammed directly into Evenson’s face.

Blood immediately sprayed from his nose.

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