A shrill ringtone tore through the silence of the night.
"Eugh..."
Evenson groaned as he fumbled blindly across the nightstand until his hand found his phone. Still half asleep, he answered with a voice thick with exhaustion.
"Yeah... Evenson speaking. Who is this?"
The reply came instantly, hurried and tense.
"Evenson, it’s Coulson. I need your help. It’s an emergency."
Evenson forced himself upright and glanced at the bedside clock.
1:00 A.M.
His expression darkened.
"Coulson... do you have any idea what time it is?"
"I’m sorry for calling this late," Coulson said rapidly, sounding anything but apologetic. "But this can’t wait."
Still rubbing his eyes, Evenson muttered,
"An emergency? And why exactly is that my problem?"
A deafening explosion erupted through the phone before Coulson could answer.
Evenson was suddenly wide awake.
"...What the hell was that? Are you in the middle of a war?"
Outside Coulson’s SUV, a fresh crater smoked where a missile had struck only moments earlier.
Tony Stark and Obadiah Stane were tearing the industrial district apart, and missiles were flying in every direction. One of them had nearly vaporized Coulson’s vehicle.
If this continued much longer, Tony might survive the fight...
...while Coulson died from collateral damage.
"It’s worse than a war!" Coulson shouted over the noise. "Are you going to help or not?"
Evenson immediately guessed what had happened.
Tony and Obadiah have started fighting.
He was already reaching for his clothes. Watching Iron Man’s first real battle in person sounded far more entertaining than sleeping.
Then another thought crossed his mind.
Never waste an opportunity.
If S.H.I.E.L.D. was asking him for help...
There was no reason to do it for free.
He smiled.
"Relax. I’ll help."
Coulson nearly sighed with relief.
"Thank God. Thank you."
"The business card I gave you," Evenson said. "You still have it?"
"Of course. I’m literally calling the number printed on it."
"Good."
Evenson’s grin widened.
"Turn it over."
"...Why?"
Confused, Coulson flipped the card over.
For one hopeful second he wondered if the card was some kind of magical focus. Maybe Evenson could use it as a teleportation anchor.
Instead, Evenson said,
"Read what’s written there."
Coulson looked.
On the back, in absurdly cheerful print, was a list of services:
Richter Occult Services
Family tradition in exorcisms
Demon removal
Fortune telling
Palm reading
Astrology
Other supernatural consultations
Coulson blinked.
"...What exactly is your point?"
"My point," Evenson replied in a perfectly serious tone, "is that tonight counts as an exorcism."
He paused.
"So let’s settle the service fee before I leave."
"I don’t negotiate prices."
Coulson stared at the phone in disbelief.
For a moment he seriously considered throwing it out the window.
What is wrong with this guy?
Heroes were supposed to rush toward danger because it was the right thing to do.
Superman didn’t invoice the United Nations afterward.
Nobody had ever heard of Ultraman submitting an expense report for saving Earth.
Yet here was Evenson...
...asking for payment before he’d even left his bed.
His priorities were unlike anyone Coulson had ever met.
"Let me talk to him."
A calm, authoritative voice suddenly joined the call.
Nick Fury.
Although Fury had approved Coulson’s decision to seek Evenson’s help, he had monitored the entire conversation through the secure video link.
This wasn’t simply requesting information anymore.
They were asking Evenson to enter an active combat zone.
And Fury wanted to judge the warlock’s character for himself.
Sure enough...
The man immediately started bargaining.
"You intend to negotiate with S.H.I.E.L.D.?" Fury asked.
Evenson frowned.
"And you are?"
"I’m Nick Fury."
For a split second, Evenson was genuinely surprised.
He hadn’t expected the Director himself to be involved.
Then again...
It made sense.
Anything involving Tony Stark tended to climb the chain of command very quickly.
Speaking directly to Fury was actually preferable.
Whatever Coulson promised would ultimately require Fury’s approval anyway.
"Director Fury."
Evenson’s tone became noticeably more polite.
"I’ve heard quite a lot about you."
"Oh?"
"You know who I am?"
Evenson chuckled.
"The Director of S.H.I.E.L.D. isn’t exactly an anonymous office worker."
"Fair enough."
Fury decided to skip the pleasantries.
"Let’s get to the point."
"You intend to bargain with S.H.I.E.L.D.?"
"Of course."
Evenson answered without the slightest embarrassment.
"You pay your agents, don’t you?"
"I’m not one of your agents."
"I’m a private citizen."
"You can’t seriously expect me to work for free."
For a moment...
Nick Fury couldn’t find a flaw in that logic.
After all...
He was asking someone outside the organization to risk his life.
That wasn’t exactly volunteer work.
"Fine."
Fury glanced toward the live battlefield feed.
"We’re wasting time."
"What do you want?"
Outwardly, Fury remained calm.
Privately, he had already begun evaluating the answer.
If Evenson demanded something outrageous...
If greed outweighed judgment...
Then S.H.I.E.L.D.’s entire assessment of him would have to change.
Someone with tremendous power and limitless ambition inevitably became a threat.
Better to identify that early than regret it later.
Instead...
Evenson asked,
"I want a car."
Silence.
"...A car?"
Even Fury was caught off guard.
Of every demand he’d imagined...
That hadn’t made the list.
"It isn’t that strange," Evenson said matter-of-factly.
"I’m an adult living in America."
"Not owning a car is honestly kind of embarrassing."
His voice became slightly dejected.
"You also know what my finances look like."
"I can’t exactly afford one."
Fury almost laughed.
That was it?
He had prepared himself for demands involving classified information, magical artifacts, political favors...
Instead...
The man wanted transportation.
"No problem."
Fury answered immediately.
"What brand?"
"Lamborghini?"
"Bentley?"
"Bugatti?"
"As long as you resolve this situation, Tony Stark will be more than happy to pay the bill."
It was a small piece of financial judo.
Why spend S.H.I.E.L.D.’s budget when the billionaire whose life was being saved could cover the expense instead?
Taxpayer money should stay where it belonged.
Evenson, however, had something entirely different in mind.
"I don’t want any of those."
"I want the Hydra Schmidt."
"You’ve heard of that car."
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