The Laziest God Mortal Reincarnation

The carriage rocked gently beneath me.

Not enough to disturb Dream Haven.

Obviously.

If an SSS-rank pillow couldn’t protect me from a slightly uneven road, I would have demanded a refund from whoever created it.

I was currently lying across the entire back seat with my head resting comfortably against the silver pillow.

Alone.

Completely alone.

It was wonderful.

No Cassian standing three steps behind me.

No Father appearing with another responsibility.

No Master Valerian reminding me that sleeping was apparently not a valid training method.

And most importantly...

No Penelope waking me up.

I closed my eyes.

Peace.

Beautiful.

Temporary.

Unfortunately, the carriage was carrying me directly toward Zenith Academy.

Which meant the temporary part was rapidly becoming more important.

Penelope had already left one week ago.

Unlike me, she wasn’t guaranteed admission.

Zenith automatically accepted anyone who awakened S potential or higher.

SSS.

SS.

S.

Apparently the Academy considered rejecting people at those levels an irresponsible waste of talent.

A and B potentials weren’t given the same privilege.

They had to pass an entrance examination.

And Zenith didn’t even make everyone take the same test.

That would have been too simple.

Each applicant received an examination specifically designed for them.

Different objective.

Different environment.

Different weaknesses being tested.

Extremely troublesome.

Which was why Penelope had gone ahead of me.

Her examination had already taken place several days ago.

The results would be announced today.

A few hours after I arrived.

I wasn’t worried.

Not even slightly.

Penelope would pass.

I’d spent four months watching her manage an infirmary containing hundreds of patients, dozens of healers, apothecaries, supplies, schedules, nobles who believed their wealth entitled them to faster treatment, and me.

Especially me.

If Zenith couldn’t find a place for someone capable of managing all that while preventing me from sleeping in empty patient beds...

Then Zenith’s entrance examination was defective.

[That is an interesting measurement of competence.]

’It’s accurate.’

[You are using yourself as an administrative disaster.]

’I prefer administrative challenge.’

[Disaster.]

’Challenge.’

The System didn’t answer.

Which meant I had won.

Probably.

I shifted slightly and pulled Dream Haven closer beneath my head.

The Academy was still several hours away.

I could have slept.

I should have slept.

I desperately wanted to sleep.

But there was one problem.

Yesterday.

More specifically...

My final conversation with Father before leaving the estate.

I sighed.

Then opened my eyes.

Why couldn’t important conversations happen after naps?

***

Father’s office had become considerably more familiar over the last few months.

Unfortunately.

The more involved he became in my life, the more often I somehow ended up sitting across from his desk.

Five years ago, I barely saw him.

Now I occasionally wondered whether he had developed an ability that allowed him to sense whenever I became too comfortable.

Yesterday afternoon had been one of those occasions.

I had entered his office carrying Dream Haven.

Father had been sitting behind his desk.

Stephan stood beside him.

Several documents rested on the table.

I recognized trouble immediately.

Paperwork.

My greatest natural predator.

"Sit," Father said.

I looked at the chair.

Then at him.

"How long?"

His expression didn’t change.

"Sit."

That wasn’t an answer.

But I sat.

Dream Haven went behind my back.

Comfort first.

Always.

Father pushed a document toward me.

"Zenith has changed the structure for your generation."

"I heard."

I hadn’t.

Not properly.

Penelope had mentioned something about new classes weeks ago.

I was probably asleep during the detailed part.

Father’s eyes narrowed slightly.

"You know the details?"

"Some."

"Which details?"

Dangerous question.

I considered my options.

"Classes."

"Yes."

"Students."

"Generally involved."

"Professors."

Stephan looked away.

Father stared at me.

I smiled.

"Perhaps you should explain."

"That would be best."

Apparently.

Father leaned back.

"Your generation will have five permanent classes."

That caught a little of my attention.

"Permanent?"

"For your entire time at Zenith."

That sounded dangerous.

"What if I dislike mine?"

"You remain in it."

"What if they dislike me?"

"You remain in it."

"What if everyone mutually agrees that separation is healthiest?"

Father ignored me.

Unreasonable.

"Each class will contain one SSS-potential student."

I blinked.

Ah.

That explained five.

Elizabeth Aurelius.

James Vellaroux.

Sophie Trohan.

Daphne Spinster.

And me.

Father continued.

"The classes will be balanced as closely as possible based on potential, core ranks, attributes, combat roles, support capabilities, academics, experience, and other factors."

That sounded like a lot of effort.

Fortunately, none of it involved me.

I relaxed.

"Good."

Father looked at me.

"What?"

"You haven’t heard the important part."

There was always an important part.

I should have known.

"Your year will not have an overall individual ranking."

That was surprising.

Zenith’s rankings were famous.

Students competed for resources, access to training grounds, rewards, and apparently the privilege of bragging about being better than everyone beneath them.

I had never particularly cared.

No ranking sounded excellent.

"Even better."

Father’s fingers stopped moving.

"The classes will be ranked instead."

My good mood weakened.

"Meaning?"

"Your entire class succeeds or fails together."

I stared at him.

That sounded significantly less excellent.

Father continued.

"Academic performance. Combat exercises. Field missions. Monster hunts. Team battles. Crafting. Healing. Strategy. Research."

Each word somehow made things worse.

"The class ranking will determine certain rewards and privileges."

I frowned.

"So if someone fails an exam..."

"It affects the class."

"If someone performs badly during a mission..."

"It affects the class."

"If someone decides not to participate..."

Father looked directly at me.

Suspicious.

"It affects the class."

I adjusted Dream Haven.

"Seems unfair."

"That is intentional."

Of course.

Zenith had apparently developed an educational philosophy based on collective suffering.

I could respect the efficiency.

Then Father said the sentence that ruined everything.

"Each SSS student will serve as the official leader of their class."

Silence.

I looked at him.

He looked at me.

Stephan remained impressively neutral.

"No."

Father didn’t react.

"No?" he repeated.

"Correct."

"You haven’t been asked."

"Then I’m declining in advance."

"You can’t."

That was unacceptable.

"Surely Zenith understands that some students possess different talents."

"They do."

"My talents include healing."

"Yes."

"Barriers."

"Yes."

"Apothecary."

"Yes."

"Sleeping."

"No."

"Debatable."

Father ignored that.

"Leadership is part of the curriculum."

I stared at him.

"Why?"

"Because Headmaster Vale believes exceptional power without the ability to lead others is dangerous."

I thought about that.

Then shrugged.

"I can simply not become exceptionally powerful."

[Main Quest.]

’Quiet.’

Father continued.

"The SSS students will be responsible for class decisions during certain exercises. Team organization. Resource allocation. Strategy. Selecting participants."

More paperwork disguised as education.

Horrifying.

"What happens if the leader is bad?"

"The class suffers."

"That sounds like a problem for my future classmates."

Father’s expression changed.

Very slightly.

I recognized that look.

I had seen it shortly before physical training was added to my mornings.

I immediately became more careful.

"Alash."

"Yes?"

"You will take this seriously."

Ah.

There it was.

Father voice.

I sighed.

"I’ll try."

"Properly."

"I’ll try properly."

"That is not reassuring."

"It is the maximum reassurance currently available."

Stephan coughed.

Possibly hiding something.

Traitor.

Father watched me for several seconds.

Then pushed another document aside.

"You won’t be able to solve every problem yourself."

"That was already my plan."

"You’ll have students with lower potential."

"Expected."

"Some considerably weaker than you."

"Also expected."

"You are responsible for helping them improve."

I frowned.

"That wasn’t expected."

Father leaned forward.

"A leader is not simply the strongest person in the group."

I knew that.

Mostly.

"A powerful person can win a duel," Father said. "A leader wins wars."

I looked at him.

That sounded suspiciously rehearsed.

"Did Headmaster Vale write that?"

"No."

"Master Valerian?"

"No."

"Stephan?"

Stephan finally looked at me.

"No, Young Master."

I returned my attention to Father.

"You’ve been waiting to say that."

His expression remained perfectly serious.

Which meant yes.

I chose not to ruin the moment.

Then another thought appeared.

"Penelope."

Father’s eyes sharpened slightly.

"What about her?"

"Which class will she be in?"

"That has not been announced."

I frowned.

"I want her in mine."

Stephan went very still.

I didn’t notice anything unusual at the time.

Looking back...

Suspicious.

Father simply asked, "Why?"

"Because she knows how to organize things."

"You’re the leader."

"Exactly."

He stared.

I continued.

"Every successful leader requires competent people."

Father was silent.

"Also, she already knows how to make me do things."

Stephan’s mouth twitched.

Father looked tired.

I considered that a reasonable argument.

"I don’t control Academy placement," he said.

Technically true.

I sighed.

Hopefully Zenith had enough sense to put Penelope with me.

If I was being forced to lead thirty-something strangers, I wanted at least one person nearby who understood how terrible that idea was.

Father reached for the final stack of documents.

Four thin folders.

He placed them in front of me.

"What are these?"

"The other SSS students."

That immediately got my attention.

More than the leadership discussion had.

Father noticed.

Probably disappointing.

I picked up the first folder.

"Elizabeth Aurelius."

"First Princess."

"I know who she is."

"Do you?"

I looked at him.

"She’s the princess."

"Excellent."

Sarcasm.

From Father.

I was proud.

I opened the report.

Elizabeth Aurelius

Potential: SSS

Title: Elemental Sovereign

Attributes: Water, Fire, Earth, Air

Special Constitutions: Magic, Intelligence

Four attributes.

That seemed excessive.

I already knew the basics from rumors around my own Awakening.

Elizabeth had awakened before me.

So had James Vellaroux.

The kingdom had nearly lost its mind when two SSS potentials appeared in the same generation.

Then three more of us followed.

I turned the page.

There were notes about royal tutors.

Elemental training.

Academic records.

Political education.

Diplomatic training.

I stopped reading.

Too much work.

"She seems busy."

Father said nothing.

Next.

James Vellaroux

Potential: SSS

Title: Radiant Spatial Blade Master

Attributes: Light, Space

Special Constitutions: Strength, Stamina

I stared slightly longer.

Space.

That was annoying.

Light was already troublesome.

Combining it with spatial magic sounded like someone had deliberately designed a swordsman whose primary purpose was making barriers miserable.

[Concerned?]

’No.’

[You stared at the title for twelve seconds.]

’I’m appreciating typography.’

[...]

James was also Elizabeth’s fiancé.

Second son of Duke Vellaroux.

Extensive sword training.

Combat-focused education.

Everything about the profile said he enjoyed activities involving consciousness.

Unfortunate.

The third folder surprised me.

Sophie Trohan

Potential: SSS

Title: Froststorm Valkyrie

Attributes: Ice, Lightning

Special Constitutions: Agility, Perception

Trohan.

I knew Duke Trohan.

Not personally.

He had attended my Awakening.

He was one of the Five Dukes.

Apparently Sophie hadn’t been born into his family.

Commoner.

Adopted after Awakening.

Her younger brother had been adopted as well.

Interesting.

Her parents had even been allowed to remain at the estate.

That was unusual.

I continued.

Ice.

Lightning.

Agility.

Perception.

Fast.

Probably extremely fast.

I already disliked the possibility of fighting her.

Fast people expected other people to move.

The final folder.

Daphne Spinster

Potential: SSS

Title: Crimson Gravity Reaver

Attributes: Blood, Gravity

Special Constitutions: Magic, Willpower

I paused.

"That title sounds friendly."

Father ignored the comment.

Daphne had been an orphan.

Duke Spinster adopted her after her Awakening.

He already possessed an adult son and daughter.

The documents didn’t say much about their relationship.

Official reports rarely included sentences like:

Everyone hates each other.

So that meant nothing.

Blood and Gravity.

That combination sounded considerably less pleasant than healing and barriers.

I looked over the four folders again.

Four people.

Four SSS potentials.

Exactly four.

The same number as the missing fragments of the Akashic Key.

Of course Father didn’t know that.

Nobody did.

Except me.

And the System.

"Why give me these?"

"Because they’re your competitors."

I looked up.

"I don’t care."

"I expected that."

"Then why?"

"Because whether you care or not, you’ll be interacting with them for years."

That was difficult to argue with.

Father’s gaze dropped toward the documents.

"Learn about them before deciding what they are."

That sounded unnecessarily wise.

I placed the folders into my storage ring.

"Anything else?"

"Yes."

Of course.

Father looked directly at me.

"Do not sleep through your first day."

I immediately stood.

"Meeting over."

"Alash."

"I have packing."

"You finished packing yesterday."

"Emotional packing."

I picked up Dream Haven.

Stephan opened the door for me.

Wonderful man.

As I walked out, Father called after me.

"And do not judge your classmates solely by potential."

I stopped.

Looked back.

"Penelope is B."

Father nodded.

Point understood.

I left.

***

The memory faded.

I found myself staring at the carriage ceiling again.

Leadership.

Terrible idea.

I could heal people.

Protect people.

Make potions.

Occasionally make intelligent decisions when circumstances became sufficiently hostile.

But managing an entire class?

Every day?

No.

Absolutely unreasonable.

I had spent the last several years becoming responsible.

Apparently the universe interpreted that as consent for additional responsibilities.

[Growth has consequences.]

’Don’t start.’

[You wanted to become strong enough that people would no longer need to sacrifice themselves for you.]

My expression changed slightly.

I looked toward the carriage window.

Trees passed outside.

[Protecting others does not only mean standing in front of attacks.]

I remained silent.

Annoying System.

It had become much better at saying things I didn’t want to hear.

I sat up.

Dream Haven remained against my back.

Then reached toward my storage ring.

Four folders appeared in my hands.

I had already read them twice.

Once yesterday.

Once this morning.

This would be the third.

Not because Father told me to.

Obviously.

I opened Elizabeth’s file.

Golden-haired princess.

Elemental Sovereign.

Then James.

Dark-haired swordsman.

Radiant Spatial Blade Master

Sophie.

Froststorm Valkyrie.

Daphne.

Crimson Gravity Reaver.

I placed all four beside each other.

Five SSS potentials in one generation.

Impossible enough that Headmaster Vale had apparently redesigned the entire Academy year around us.

But for me...

It wasn’t mysterious.

The Key had been divided into five pieces.

One inside me.

Four inside newborns scattered throughout this world.

The System had told me something important years ago.

Their potential would exceed the highest potential of this realm after Awakening.

SSS.

Exactly what happened.

I tapped Elizabeth’s profile.

Then James.

Sophie.

Daphne.

"These are them."

[Likely.]

I frowned.

"Likely?"

[The evidence is extremely strong.]

"Five SSS potentials."

[Correct.]

"Five Key fragments."

[Correct.]

"I am one."

[Unfortunately.]

I ignored that.

"Leaving four."

[Excellent arithmetic.]

"And there are exactly four other SSS students my age."

[Correct.]

I leaned back.

"So they’re the vessels."

[Almost certainly.]

Almost.

I disliked almost.

There was still one problem.

The System had already told me years ago that it could sense another fragment if the vessel came close enough.

But none of these documents could prove that.

Potential wasn’t enough.

Titles weren’t enough.

Coincidence, even an absurd coincidence, wasn’t confirmation.

"So when I meet them?"

[I will detect the fragments if they enter sufficient proximity.]

"Immediately?"

[Yes.]

"And they’ll notice?"

[No.]

Good.

Very good.

The last thing I needed was four strangers suddenly hearing a System announcement.

I studied the portraits again.

These people had lived fifteen years without knowing something ancient was hidden inside them.

They believed their SSS potential belonged entirely to chance.

They had families.

Ambitions.

Problems.

Lives.

And soon...

I needed to establish bonds with them.

I closed my eyes.

Main Quest.

Of course.

Reach SS core.

Establish bonds with the other vessels.

The second part had sounded distant when I was ten.

Now all four were heading to the same Academy.

Actually...

They were probably already there.

I slowly opened my eyes.

"System."

[Yes?]

"Does ’establish bonds’ require friendship?"

[Unknown.]

"Acquaintance?"

[Unknown.]

"Mutual tolerance?"

[Unknown.]

"Sleeping in the same general area?"

[No.]

I clicked my tongue.

Worth trying.

I looked down at the four documents.

Elizabeth seemed troublesome.

James seemed exhausting.

Sophie looked energetic.

Dangerous.

Daphne looked like she might crush someone with gravity for speaking too loudly.

Potentially reasonable.

I returned the folders to my storage ring.

There was no point deciding too much before meeting them.

Father had said that too.

Annoyingly.

Learn about them before deciding what they are.

Fine.

I would meet them.

The System would confirm whether they carried the fragments.

Then...

I’d figure out the bonding problem later.

Much later.

Preferably after several naps.

I rested my head against Dream Haven again.

One final thought appeared.

Penelope.

Please be in my class.

If Zenith expected me to manage thirty-something people without her...

Then the Academy’s legendary reputation had been greatly exaggerated.

I looked outside.

Far beyond the passing forest, towers had begun appearing against the horizon.

Massive.

Distant.

White stone rising above the mountains.

Zenith Academy.

My peaceful six months were officially over.

I sighed.

"Wake me when we arrive."

[You can already see the Academy.]

"Exactly."

[That means we are close.]

"Excellent observation."

[Alash.]

I pulled Dream Haven over the side of my face.

"If I’m going to become a leader..."

I closed my eyes.

"...I should arrive well rested."

[...]

Silence.

Victory.

Probably.

And with four Akashic vessels waiting somewhere beyond those distant towers...

I fell asleep.

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