This Novel is not my Novel

"Karvaldr. I can overlook your occasional spitefulness by thinking, 'Well, cats are just like that,' but not everyone can."

Was it truly all right to begin an episode with a statement like this?

The protagonist of someone else's novel habitually spouted absurd nonsense, but today he had gone too far.

And why did he look so serious while saying something so ridiculous?

Before I knew it, I had stopped dead in my tracks, my mouth hanging open.

Even though we had begun this conversation to make use of the time spent walking, I could not suppress my sheer bewilderment.

"...Not only do I have no idea what you are trying to say, but before we even address that, your statement compels me to question whether you are truly in your right mind."

"I meant that if you want to be friends with Sveinn, you should probably refrain from acting spiteful. And my mind is perfectly sound right now."

I had no idea why he was talking as though I wanted to befriend Sveinn but was acting like a tsundere because I was too embarrassed to approach him warmly.

Judging by that alone, the protagonist of someone else's novel was clearly not in his right mind.

There was no room for doubt.

"Why are you suddenly clutching Yor with a frightened expression and slowly backing away?"

"Because you appear to have gone mad, and I fear your madness may be contagious."

"Ha ha ha! You really are so unpredictable."

"......"

Why could he not consider the possibility that he was the strange one, not me?

I hugged the baby dragon more tightly and directed a thoroughly disgusted glare at the protagonist of someone else's novel.

Did he only then feel the need to explain his state of mind?

The protagonist of someone else's novel brought up what had led him to his misconception.

"During the last Mock Battle class, you gave Sveinn the Seasoning Set treasure note you had tried so hard to protect until the very end. You even deliberately waited for him in front of the no-combat zone."

"Surely... you do not believe I wish to befriend Sveinn merely because of that?"

"No. That incident showed me that you don't dislike Sveinn, but there is another decisive reason."

Strictly speaking, I did dislike Sveinn.

Perhaps it would have been different if he had fought beside the original protagonist until the very end and died.

Or at the very least, if he had been a villain with a tragic story and compelling characterization.

But Sveinn was a character whose defining trait was his "ordinariness," who pretended to be the original protagonist's friend before abruptly betraying him.

The reason he did so was never revealed, either.

Consequently, it was utterly impossible to understand Sveinn's actions.

Meanwhile, it was all too easy to empathize with Reisir as he grieved over the deaths of those around him and suffered from the piercing anguish of betrayal.

The present Sveinn, who has yet to betray anyone, would feel terribly wronged if he knew this....

In any case, I did not like Sveinn for the aforementioned reasons.

Reisir's argument was therefore built on a false premise from the very beginning.

As I resumed walking, I responded in a relaxed tone.

"If such a reason exists, then by all means, present it."

"The way you treated me last year. That is my evidence."

"Do you believe I am the sort of person who blindly torments anyone I wish to befriend?!"

That was not tsundere behavior or anything of the sort.

It merely meant someone possessed a twisted, disagreeable personality, had developed an insecure attachment style and low self-esteem...

Or was simply emotionally immature—

Wait. Is that what a tsundere is? More importantly, that sounds a little like Karvaldr.... Of course, Karvaldr did not torment Reisir because he wanted to befriend him. But is it possible that wasn't entirely untrue? Karvaldr envied the way Reisir lived like family with the Vitnir father and daughter, and envy can be considered a form of admiration. If I also take into account that Karvaldr was originally a character who might have become a supporting character....

...It would be best not to think any deeper.

It would be disastrous if even I became infected with Reisir's belief that "Karvaldr = tsundere."

I did not know exactly how or why that would be disastrous, but some things simply could not be allowed.

"You may have been like that in the past, but I don't believe you are anymore. Things somehow worked out between us, but you must have realized that such behavior would normally leave you and the other person with no choice but to become enemies. Besides, the guilt would make you uncomfortable too."

"If that is what you believe, why did you present what happened last year as evidence?"

"I wasn't referring to what happened during the first semester. You never actually tormented Sveinn in the first place, did you? You interfered to keep me from becoming friends with him and showed that you disapproved of him, but you had valid reasons and never failed to explain them.... So it would be difficult to call that tormenting him, wouldn't it?"

Even so, Sveinn himself might have perceived it as harassment, which had left me needlessly self-conscious and privately uneasy.

I felt relieved, yet also felt that I should not allow myself to be entirely relieved.

The standards Reisir applied to me seemed excessively generous.

"What I meant was the way you acted during the second semester, not the first. You behaved strangely and unnaturally while trying to push me away for no apparent reason."

"You are saying that the way I acted then resembles how I treat Sveinn now? What utter non—"

I began to scoff derisively, only to falter.

It had suddenly occurred to me that the original protagonist had some reason to perceive it that way.

After all....

Back then, I was wary of growing close to Reisir because I did not want to become entangled in the original story, get swept up in his misfortunes, and end up hurt. Now I am wary of Sveinn because I fear he may betray us as he did in the pre-remake original work.

In both cases, I was blindly trying to keep my distance because of anxieties born from the contents of the original novel I had read.

They were also remarkably similar in that I could not honestly explain the reason to anyone.

When I fell silent for a moment, at a loss for words, my eyes met those of the protagonist of someone else's novel. He wore an expression that clearly said, See?

"You never realized it before, and you've only just figured it out, haven't you?"

It was true that I had never realized the similarity before and had only just noticed it.

However, what that irritating man believed was not one hundred percent correct. In fact, he was completely wrong.

I genuinely had no desire to befriend Sveinn.

"Even if, for the sake of argument, we assume that I treated you that way last year... for no particular reason."

"It wasn't that you had no reason. You wanted to be friends with me, but you were embarrassed to let it show."

"Sveinn's case is different. I have a clear reason for my behavior. I truly find him objectionable."

"Does that mean you treated me that way simply because you liked me for no reason?"

"......"

"Sorry. I'll stop joking and listen seriously now."

I shall ignore the nonsense uttered by the protagonist of someone else's novel and continue the narration.

As I mentioned in the previous episode, I had expected Reisir to raise the subject of Sveinn eventually.

That was why I had prepared an excuse in advance—one that even the original protagonist could more or less accept.

However—

"The reason I find that man Sveinn Odd objectionable and remain wary of him is...."

—the moment I opened my mouth to begin explaining, the thought Is this really all right? crossed my mind.

In Episode 170, Sveinn had been so tense and cautious because he feared leaving footprints on an expensive rug.

Yet in Episode 183, not only had he approached Reisir, a nobleman, first, but he had even asked Reisir to teach him spear techniques.

Then, in the following episode, when Reisir told him they were the same age and that he could speak more casually, Sveinn had tried to accept the offer immediately without even making a show of declining.

I could condemn him by saying that there was something unsettling about the way he seemed to respect objects more than people. That he clearly regarded Reisir as an easy target and intended to squeeze every possible benefit out of him.

In Episode 182, Fjodora had been the first to say that Yor and I could create rain while Sveinn controlled the rainwater, allowing us to fight efficiently.

Even though I had expressed my displeasure and opposed the idea at the time...

During Professor Radvisin's class in Episode 196, Sveinn had spoken as though my ability were simply another component of his own skill.

I intended to begin by accusing him of treating my feelings and wishes as less valuable than a mere rug and trampling them underfoot. Then I would criticize him for acting as though receiving things from others was only natural....

But condemning him so thoroughly merely because he had been careful not to tread on a rug was nothing more than confirmation bias.

I knew better than anyone that I had simply arranged the facts to suit my convenience.

That was why I could not bring myself to say any of it aloud.

Making speculative accusations behind his back, then advising Reisir that Sveinn was not a good person and should be kept at a distance—sowing discord under the guise of advice....

It occurred to me that the transfer student mentioned in Episode 168 might have heard something similar and begun avoiding me as a result.

And if Reisir were persuaded by my words, came to believe Sveinn was "that sort of person," and distanced himself from him...

It would be no different from turning Reisir into someone like that transfer student.

...I feel sick.

This was truly the worst.

Not because I felt sorry for Sveinn, who would earn someone's hostility without even knowing why.

What made it particularly awful was that I had swallowed the speech I had prepared solely because I did not want to become a bad person.

"Karvaldr...? Why did you stop halfway through?"

"...No. ✧ NоvеIight ✧ (Original source) It is nothing."

"It doesn't look like nothing. You suddenly went pale too...."

"I was suddenly overcome with self-loathing...."

"Hm? What do you mean?"

To think I would make such a slip of the tongue. I must have been deeply shaken.

I clenched my teeth belatedly, but he had already heard the words "self-loathing."

Without the slightest idea what I had almost done to him, Reisir busily studied my complexion with a face full of concern.

"...It truly is nothing. Merely that disliking someone does not justify spreading that feeling to others.... And now that I think about it, perhaps my reasons for disliking him are not particularly significant after all...? So pay it no mind."

"A moment ago, you confidently declared that you had a clear reason, but now you've abruptly changed your story. That only makes me more curious."

As expected of the relentlessly persistent protagonist of someone else's novel, he refused to let it go.

No—would anyone react the same way in this situation?

"If it troubles you that much.... Whether you grow close to Sveinn is your decision, but you still should not open your heart to him completely.... Ah, no. Is it wrong of me to say even that? Then, hmm.... Do not treat him as you treat me."

"Hmm...? What is that supposed to mean?"

"For instance, do not disclose your secrets to him, seek his counsel about various matters... or swear that you will protect him no matter what. Do not do any of those things."

"Ah...."

"And if possible.... If his words and mine ever conflict, or if he and I find ourselves opposed to one another, I would like you to trust me and stand on my side......"

"I... see? So that is what you want from me, Karvaldr...?!"

The corners of the protagonist of someone else's novel's mouth began twitching slowly upward.

At the same time, I felt the temperature of my possessed body's face begin to rise.

I pressed my lips tightly together, lengthened my stride, and marched ahead at a rapid pace.

When we finally reached the entrance to the mountain behind the academy—

"You dragged me all the way out here before dawn, so you had better produce meaningful results. Do you understand?"

I activated 【Encouragement】 by barking those words at him.

There was nothing particularly problematic up to that point.

Recalling the past had caused me some emotional distress, but Reisir had not triggered my trauma. I had brought it upon myself.

That was not why I had narrated in the previous episode that Reisir had made a difficult request.

"Karvaldr? My stomach suddenly feels strange too.... Could this possibly be...?"

Around ten minutes after we began following the mountain path, the original protagonist complained of nausea, his expression ominous.

It would have been wonderful if his discomfort had been purely psychological, as mine had been earlier.

"Damn it...."

It was an early sign of the Demon Realm Generation Phenomenon.

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