[JO INCHAN’S POV]
“…Yeah, I want to meet him too.”
As soon as Chise-hyung heard that answer, he immediately grabbed my wrist and started dragging me along. A little taken aback, I hurriedly tried to stop in place, but since he had such superhuman strength, I was pulled all the way to the entrance before I could even resist.
“W-Wait, are we going to go there right this instant?”
“Of course. he’s at my studio right now. He’s been lying there the whole time, recovering. You should come over and rest there too. Besides, Lim Seunghoon and Kang Hyukwoo keep coming and going from your place at all hours. And you’ve got a fever, I can’t just leave you here by yourself.”
With his characteristic lively way of speaking, my hyung totally distracted me, and then, with a hearty “Heave ho!”, he even grabbed my feet and shoved them into my shoes without any care. It was as if he had completely forgotten how old I was. My face, already flushed from the fever, turned an even deeper shade of red as I kept insisting for him to stop.
“I’m not sure if our Inchan still remembers this. Back when we were promoting, you once collapsed from a cold, and Yutae-hyung carried you on his back, running all the way to the emergency room. I wanted to try carrying you like our hyung did, but even this isn’t easy. Why are all our members built like Namsan1? Ouuch, my back.”
“…….”
“…Hyung was really worried about you. As soon as he woke up after the accident, he asked for you first. He told me if you got caught in the rain, I should make sure you take the medicine right away. You always get seriously sick whenever you catch a cold.”
If Yutae-hyung were alive, he would definitely hate even seeing me.
I did something that terrible, so there’s no way he would have looked for me first.
‘…I already knew from the start, didn’t I? The members were just mistaken…….’
No way, was I actually disappointed?
I knew the reality of the situation better than anyone, so I didn’t understand why I was feeling this way.
“Let’s stop by the pharmacy before we go. You don’t want to stay here and run into those bastards again, do you?”
His words were so clearly filled with concern that I found myself unable to say anything, simply keeping my head lowered. Chise-hyung chuckled when he saw me like that, then ruffled my hair and, as he turned his head, stopped for a second when he saw some flower petals near the bathroom.
“Wait.”
He immediately walked back to the bathroom and picked up the bouquet that had been carelessly shoved into the corner. The wilted flowers, their petals darkened, didn’t seem to catch his attention at all as Chise-hyung called out to me in a tone that was intentionally playful.
“Ah, I’m hurt, I’m really hurt. How could you just toss aside a gift meant for your hyung like this? Your hyung is only letting it slide because you’re sick!”
“Give it to me, I’ll send you a new one…….”
I had hidden it somewhere out of sight, yet he still managed to find it. Unable to overcome my embarrassment, I clenched the hem of my coat in my fist and mumbled. But Chise-hyung shook his head and retorted, “No way! Who takes back a gift after giving it? That’s so mean.”. Then, hugging the bouquet to his chest, he led me outside.
“…I haven’t given it to you yet.”
“I can’t hear you, I can’t hear you. It’s mine, this is mine. Ah, should I fasten its belt for it? We can’t let this poor thing fall twice. Aww, you poor thing.”
No matter what I was murmuring behind him, Chise-hyung kept walking without a pause. He placed the bouquet in the back seat of his car with a satisfied expression, then promptly shoved me into the passenger seat.
“…….”
He was truly a self-willed individual, both in the past and present. After Yutae-hyung disappeared, there was no one left to keep him in check, so he had mellowed out a bit—but now, it felt like he was back to his original state.
If I were to find the cause….
“If I told you that Yutae-hyung is still alive … could you believe it?”
That must be it. With a faint frown at the situation I could roughly guess, I kept my mouth shut and just watched my hyung grab the steering wheel.
***
As we arrived at the studio and were about to open the door, someone wearing a hoodie came right up behind Chise-hyung and clung to him.
“Hyung.”
Sensing a sudden presence, Chise-hyung immediately turned around to check the other person’s face, and playfully slapped his butt before speaking.
“Did you go out? Let me know if you need anything.”
“No, I just stepped out to make a call. It’s nothing.”
“Really?”
Realizing at once that the other person was the one and only member of the group who was the same age as me, I shrank back behind Chise-hyung, trying to hide. However, unfortunately, I didn’t have a small enough frame to use someone else as a shield, so his kinda cocky voice immediately landed on me.
“Who is this?”
The eyebrows, which had been lazily resting on his finely sculpted forehead, arched as soon as they spotted me. Then, without hesitation, he reached out, grabbed the hem of my shirt near my chest, and yanked me toward him.
“You’re Jo Inchan, the guy who ran away like a scared rabbit when he saw me. Not running away this time?”
He brushed his hair back, and his bright yellow eyes, fully revealed, glared at me menacingly, as if they were about to crush me. Those eyes belonged to Nam Yihwon.
“Well, if it were me, I’d stay still too. If you run away again, you might actually get beaten to death by me then. You should consider yourself lucky that our hyung is inside.”
Hearing those words, I couldn’t help but frown.
That was precisely the kind of statement that showed the members truly considered Han Seungbeom as our hyung.
The members, born with fierce tempers and large statures, had never lost a fight anywhere, then we encountered others like ourselves for the first time in the group called Prism. So, in the early days when everyone was young, there were often times when we fought as if we were seriously trying to kill each other. But from that somewhat crude process, the only thing we gained was not a hierarchy, but an unwritten rule that we all had to follow.
‘Do not throw punches in front of Seo Yutae.’
There were several reasons why that rule was set in place. First, our hyung hated people who crossed the line, and second, the killer muscles attached to his body were built in a boxing gym that trained professional athletes.
In short, it meant that someone once arrogantly threw a punch in front of our eldest hyung, then an irreversible situation occurred.
‘…I thought Nam Yihwon would be the one to reject Han Seungbeom the most.’
Wasn’t this just a play put together to gain some comfort? No matter how much the child named Han Seungbeom resembled our hyung, he couldn’t possibly imitate him perfectly in every way. I couldn’t understand why Nam Yihwon was going this far.
“…Let go.”
Even though I was feeling guilty, when I saw a friend I had often argued with and relied on during our group activities, the sharp words came out of habit. But instead of getting angry, Nam Yihwon’s mood seemed to improve. He let out a small chuckle, smirking, before releasing me
“Yeah, this is how you’re supposed to be.”
I was really relieved that Nam Yihwon hadn’t grabbed me around the neck. As I was thinking about this and cupping the spot where the handprint was left, I heard a fine sharp sound coming from behind the door.
At that, Chise-hyung hurriedly opened the door, and inside the messy studio, I saw Jay curled up on the floor in a panic, with Cha Woon-hyung holding him.
“Calm down! You need to speak clearly for me to understand!”
“What’s wrong? What happened?”
Then, Jay, who had his arms wrapped around his head, looked up at Chise-hyung.
The tears that had been welling up in the corners of his eyes fell to the floor, and a small voice escaped Jay’s lips.
“…Hyung disappeared.”
***
After listening to Jay’s incoherent words several times, Chise-hyung figured out that Han Seungbeom had heard the story about Seo Yuseong, seemed shocked by it, and then just disappeared.
‘Seungbeom-ssi was shocked by the story about Seo Yuseong?’
The members quickly contacted Pantheion to ask if they knew where Han Seungbeom was, but the only response we received was that they, too, were looking for him and hadn’t seen him around.
“You said he clearly became strange after hearing about Seo Yuseong, right?”
When Jay nodded in response to his question, Chise-hyung tightly shut his eyes.
He hesitated for some time, then said,
“…Let’s go to the sea.”
.
.
.
The members wandered near the sea looking for Han Seungbeom for quite some time, and when they finally received a message from Han Seungbeom, we headed straight to a hotel. Watching Jay rush out the moment we heard that Han Seungbeom was nearby, and the rest of the members wearing complicated expressions, I could feel my heart twisting more deeply with each passing moment.
‘This has already crossed the line. But why is everyone accepting it so casually? Do they really believe Han Seungbeom is our hyung?’
Isn’t it an extremely malicious act to wander around the place where Seo Yuseong died just to pretend to be Seo Yutae? No matter how out of their minds the members were, there was no way they could tolerate this kind of behavior.
“…….”
First, I should confess that I leaked the information to Kang Hyukwoo and apologize.
And then, I should ask him to stop toying with the members, whether by bowing or kneeling.
I didn’t care if the members, having lost the substitute for our hyung, resented me. I was already used to being hated, and I was completely convinced that this relationship would only make them sick.
Ding!
As I was thinking this and clenching my fist, the elevator reached the 100th floor. The doors opened, and the members rushed out toward Han Seungbeom.
“Hyung!”
I stood still and watched the backs of the members talking to Han Seungbeom from a little distance.
“…….”
They all looked genuinely happy. There was none of that forced feeling, like they were just acting out the ‘Hyung has returned‘ scenario under some kind of compulsion.
As I was thinking something was off and feeling unexplained fear, my back was suddenly pushed, and Han Seungbeom filled my view.
“…You, what is this!”
And as soon as I saw his face, all the plans I had solidified in my head crumbled.
A child I’d only met once at the hospital immediately saw through something that even my incredibly perceptive members, who had been with me for over a decade, had failed to notice until now. Then, with a look on his face as if his heart had shattered, he pulled my clothes down.
“…….”
The bruise in the shape of a hand was revealed, but I didn’t resist.
The way he looked at me was too identical to how our hyung used to look at me, so I couldn’t resist.
Even if I were to die, I didn’t want to show this hideous scar before the members.
It would make me feel ashamed, scared, and … sorry if they found out how I was being treated.
I wanted to hide it even more in front of people who weren’t my members. Just imagining what they would whisper after seeing my weakness was enough to fill me with unbearable distress.
But why didn’t I feel those emotions in front of this child?
“Is this Kang Hyukwoo’s doing? Or is it Lim Seunghoon’s?”
“…….”
Tears welled up in my eyes without me even realizing it.
I was surprised myself, and I muttered “…Huh?” while touching my face. Then, something I had once heard from others came into mind.
“I really thought I was fine. It was actually more bearable than I expected, I was even surprised at myself.”
“But when I opened the front door and saw my mom’s face, tears just welled up suddenly. I didn’t even know why I was crying, I just cried and cried. I don’t know, I just suddenly felt so sad … and I also felt comforted.”
I didn’t know what it felt like back then, but I felt like I could understand it now.
It was just an instinctive feeling.
“Why aren’t you saying anything? Is it just here that’s hurt?”
I couldn’t say anything, I just kept crying, and my hyung gently stroked my cheek with his fingertips.
“…….”
And at that moment, the members of Pantheion appeared in the hallway.
Hearing the commotion behind him, my hyung reflexively turned his head.
My feverish head began to buzz like it was sending out an emergency signal as the face that had been directed at me slowly turned toward the others. In response, I unconsciously reached out and grabbed my hyung’s wrist.
‘…Huh?’
“…No. Don’t look.”
I definitely couldn’t acknowledge that Han Seungbeom was Seo Yutae.
Why am I saying such things?
[END OF JO INCHAN’S POV]
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Translator’s Corner:
Don’t mind me, I’m just here enjoying the popcorn
You know. I actually expected this hyperfixation to go away at this point, but I’m still spending every week waiting for one new chapter asdfghjkl The original reached Chapter 400 now, and it’s ongoing so we still have a lot of fun waiting …. I hope the author wrote 1000 chapters of side story …. it’s possible …. just look at RIM …..
But it’s really weird how obsessed I am with this asdfhjkl I used to be obsessed with Debut or Die too, back in 2022, but even now I haven’t read the ending … I think Iast read it at chapter 500-something and havent come back for a long time … It’s quite surprising that I haven’t accidentally read spoiler about the ending though … I guess a lot of people have self control (and please keep it that way, don’t spoil the ending to me!!! people who spoiled an ending without being asked have special place in hell….). And before Debut or Die, I was obsessed with TCF …. and that one isn’t even ending yet oh my god what did they even make Cale do. It literally hurt my head when they entered things like multiverse, multiworld, so I just left looking for something more my brain friendly ……
It also reminds me that I used to follow that one idol Greatest Star in Universe or something … back when still … idk, 300 chapters?? Then I blinked and suddenly there’s 1000+ chapters ………… let’s just give up …………. there’s so many ongoings in my reading list, but now I’m stuck because I got reading block for months after finishing this story ………………… my past self who just found a random idol novel to read because i was bored definitely didn’t expect this……
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