Beastmen Are Crazy, So I Sell Them Therapy

Chapter 143: Chapter 141

"Everybody’s here right?" I asked, still watching the students below.

"Yes."

I slowly stood up and the moment I smiled, Gawain narrowed his eyes.

He knew that smile.

Unfortunately for him, I knew that he knew.

"What foolishness are you up to now?"

I immediately slapped his back, just enough to annoy him. "Have trust in me, will you?"

"Absolutely not."

"You’re hurting my feelings."

"You don’t have feelings."

I gasped.

"My Lady, every time you smile like that, property damage follows."

"That only happened a few times."

Gawain looked genuinely offended. "A few?"

"Several."

"Try dozens."

I ignored him.

"Stand up."

"No."

I grabbed Gawain’s sleeve and tugged but he didn’t move.

"The class had fun, so naturally we should have fun too."

"No."

I pulled harder.

Nothing.

The man had apparently rooted himself into the branch.

"Come on."

"No."

"For the sake of Altaire Class!"

Gawain gave me a flat look. "You mean for the sake of easing your boredom."

I looked away.

That was an incredibly rude accusation.

Mostly because it was accurate.

"That’s not the point."

"It is exactly the point."

I continued pulling.

He continued refusing.

"Let’s just go!"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"I’ll buy you dinner."

"No."

"I’ll double your salary."

"You’re lying."

"Maybe."

"There it is."

I sighed dramatically and leaned back with all my weight.

Nothing happened.

Gawain still remained seated.

At this point I was beginning to suspect he had secretly fused himself with the earth.

"Why are you being difficult?"

"Because every time you say ’let’s have fun,’ someone ends up in the infirmary."

"That’s an exaggeration."

"Last month you accidentally started a food fight that spread across three buildings."

"That was a misunderstanding."

"One building wasn’t even serving food."

"Details."

Gawain closed his eyes.

Then, finally, he let out a long sigh.

The kind of sigh people made before accepting their inevitable doom.

"Fine."

I immediately brightened. "See? I know you also want to have fun."

"No."

"Then why are you coming?"

"Because if I don’t, you’ll somehow escalate a supply raid into a diplomatic incident."

"..."

I ignored him and pointed dramatically toward the forest.

"Forward!"

"Why do you sound like a war commander?"

I gasped and placed a hand over my chest. "You praise me too much."

Gawain stared at me. "I assure you, I wasn’t."

"Such kind words."

"Those weren’t kind words."

"Such admiration."

"That wasn’t admiration."

I nodded sagely. "I understand. You’re shy."

"I’m leaving."

I grabbed his sleeve before he could take a single step.

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"We already agreed."

"Then let’s go before I drop you here."

~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

Ravian had spent the last several minutes checking on the condition of his classmates.

Most of them looked terrible. A few were injured, some were exhausted, and one student was still emotionally recovering from being ambushed by three different classes simultaneously.

Only after making sure everyone was still alive did he remember something important.

"Has anyone seen Blanca?"

Silence.

Not a single person answered.

Ravian sighed.

Of course... He should have expected this.

The moment he took his eyes off her, she would instantly disappear.

Still, he wasn’t particularly worried.

Blanca was Blanca.

Trying to keep her in one place was like trying to keep sunlight in a box.

Eventually she would just get bored, tire herself out, and return.

And when that happened—

His smile softened.

—he’d simply be there waiting for her.

After all, she was the only one he wanted.

"Umm... Ravian?"

The hesitant voice snapped him out of his thoughts.

Ravian turned around, his smile casually returning. "What?"

Jules slowly pointed toward a nearby tree. "I think the tree is trying to say something."

Ravian stared at her. "...What?"

"The tree."

"What about the tree?"

"It’s talking."

Several students immediately looked at Jules with concern.

"Did you get hit in the head?"

"Multiple times."

"That explains a lot."

"I’m serious!"

Jules pointed again. "Listen!"

Everyone went quiet when they finally noticed faint groaning noises.

"MMPH!"

"..."

"MMMPH!"

"..."

"MMPHHHH!"

The entire class slowly turned towards the suspiciously looking tree.

Jules folded her arms. "See? Talking tree."

"That’s not a talking tree."

"Then explain the noises."

Ravian sighed and walked toward it and the moment he rounded the trunk, he stopped.

Stephano was tied to the tree several times with what looked like professional-grade knots, there was even duct tape over his mouth.

"...Stephano?"

The moment Stephano saw him, his muffled screaming immediately intensified.

"Mmph!"

He stared at Stephano for a few seconds.

"MMMPH!"

Stephano finally glared at him.

"MMMMPH!"

The class burst out laughing.

"Oh my god."

"Who managed to tie him in a tree?"

"How long has he been there?"

"Apparently long enough to mold into the tree."

Stephano looked seconds away from committing murder as Ravian finally reached over and ripped the tape off in one motion.

"AAAAH!"

Stephano immediately sucked in a deep breath before shouting as loud as he could. "YOU LITTLE MENACE!!!"

The class slowly understood who it was.

"So it’s Blanca’s doing again."

"She’s the only one who could ever make Stephano that angry."

"Where is Blanca anyway?"

Meanwhile, Stephano glared at Ravian. "First of all, you could’ve removed that gently!"

"You survived."

"That’s not the point!"

Ravian ignored him. "Who tied you up?"

Stephano looked personally offended by the question. "Who do you think tied me up?"

"..."

"..."

"Of course it was that red-eyed devil! Now untie me already!"

Ravian crouched down and began undoing the ropes.

"I swear that freaking Gawain follows every single word she says."

"Also fair."

Silvano groaned. "Do you know how humiliating it is getting kidnapped by your own flag?"

"Considering it’s Blanca?"

"Good point."

The ropes finally came loose as Stephano immediately stretched his arms.

"You look fine."

"I’ve suffered emotional damage."

Ravian ignored him. "Why did they tie you up?"

Stephano immediately looked tired.

"Oh."

He sighed.

"She left a message."

Ravian already knew this wasn’t going to be good.

"Specifically for you."

Stephano cleared his throat.

Then, to Ravian’s horror, began speaking in an exaggerated high-pitched voice.

"Ian, I swear I didn’t break my promise and excruciatingly waited for you to come here—"

"She’s lying."

Stephano stopped. "What?"

"She’s lying."

"Let me finish."

"We both know she had the best sleep of her life."

"That’s not the point."

"It is absolutely the point."

Stephano pinched the bridge of his nose. "Can you let me finish the message?"

Ravian sighed. "Continue."

Stephano resumed. "—here. So now that I’ve kept my promise, I will have my fun."

He paused as he tried remembering the last part.

"P.S. Don’t come looking for me or if any of you do, I won’t come back."

Silence.

~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

Soltaire Class Territory

We were currently hiding inside a bush at the edge of Soltaire Class’s territory.

Or rather, I was the only one hiding while Gawain was simply crouching beside me.

In front of us was Soltaire’s camp.

Unlike Altaire, who apparently believed strategy meant running directly into danger, Soltaire had actually organized themselves.

Their supplies were neatly stacked, their defenses were established, and some of the students were standing guard.

It was disgustingly efficient.

I narrowed my eyes.

"So," Gawain whispered beside me, "care to tell me how we’re going to steal their supplies?"

"Ssshhh!"

He stared at me. "They can’t even hear us."

"Ssshhh!"

"We’re literally hidden inside a bush."

"Ssshhh!"

"Are you seriously shushing me?"

"Ssshhh!"

His eye twitched. "You don’t actually have a plan, do you?"

"..."

Gawain slowly closed his eyes and exhaled slowly.

"Seriously, you troublemaker—"

He reached over and pinched both my cheeks.

"Oww!"

I slapped at his hand.

"I’m still in the middle of thinking!"

"You mean improvising."

"It’s called strategy."

"It’s called being unprepared."

I was about to defend my honor when a voice suddenly spoke behind us.

"It seems that Altaire’s flag has decided to join us for lunch."

We both froze as we looked up. There were students everywhere, apparently even inside the bush.

How long had they been there? More importantly, how had we not noticed?

I slowly stood up and spread my arms dramatically.

"Behold!"

The students frowned at me.

"I present myself as a gift for your territory-warming party!"

"Cut the crap, Blanca."

The student standing in front immediately crossed his arms.

"Why are you roaming around our territory?"

I instantly abandoned my first strategy.

’Time for Plan B.’

I sniffed dramatically then threw myself onto the ground.

"My class is broke!" I cried. "We’ve lost everything! The economy has collapsed! We have no supplies! No food! No hope! We’re DOOMED!"

They only stared at me blankly.

"So I left my class and decided to beg for scraps! I was even willing to let myself be kidnapped by another class!"

Several students rolled their eyes.

"Selfish."

"Abandoned her class."

"Classic Blanca."

"Blanca’s not Blanca if she isn’t thinking about herself."

I clenched my teeth.

The disrespect.

How dare they accurately describe me?

Still, I was committed to the act.

I dramatically crawled forward and clench of the student’s pants. "Please."

"No."

"A single supply crate."

"No."

"A medical kit."

"No."

"A piece of bread?"

"No."

I pointed accusingly. "Heartless."

"You literally came here to rob us."

"Allegedly."

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