The walk to Jason’s building took longer than it had the night before.
Or maybe it only felt that way.
Every block seemed to stretch beneath her feet while her mind refused to stay quiet long enough for her to actually notice the distance passing.
Her thoughts were too loud.
She kept her hands shoved deep into her jacket pockets and lowered her head slightly against the wind. Her pace remained steady at first, but every few minutes she found herself walking faster without consciously deciding to.
She let herself replay Priya’s voice one more time.
That specific, gleeful lilt of someone repeating gossip they thought made them look clever.
Convenient.
The word had stayed with her ever since she’d heard it.
She’d heard it maybe three times in the last hour. First from Priya. Then twice more in the ripple of conversation that had followed Sarah’s confrontation.
People were already reshaping the story into something they could retell tomorrow, each person adding their own interpretation to what had actually happened.
That’s what people did.
They took a moment that belonged to someone else, stripped away everything that made it complicated, and turned it into something simple enough to entertain themselves with.
And Jason was going to carry that word around all night like it was carved into him.
Sarah knew it.
She knew exactly how he processed things. Quiet. Logical. Methodical.
He wouldn’t argue. He wouldn’t immediately lash out. He’d probably stand there and act like it didn’t matter. He’d tell himself that there was no point responding because the people saying it didn’t know him anyway.
Then he’d go home.
And somewhere underneath all of that careful reasoning, the words would just sit there.
Convenient.
She hated how easily she could imagine it.
Sarah crossed at the same corner she’d crossed the night before, walking in the opposite direction this time. Her steps slowed for half a second as the memory of the previous night came back to her.
Then came the kiss.
Again.
It had been doing that ever since she’d left his apartment. Showing up without invitation and refusing to disappear whenever she needed her mind to focus on something else.
She could still remember it too clearly.
The moment she’d leaned closer.
The warmth.
The realization of what she was doing.
The way everything inside her had suddenly become too loud.
Focus.
Sarah shook her head slightly and picked up her pace.
This isn’t about the kiss right now.
This is about getting there before he spends the whole night convincing himself Priya and Grace were right about something they know nothing about.
But the kiss came back anyway.
Of course it did.
It was stubborn. Unwelcome. Persistent.
This time, Sarah let it stay there for a second instead of immediately shoving it away.
Because pretending it wasn’t relevant to tonight was becoming a losing argument. Even she couldn’t keep making the same excuse to herself.
I panicked. She swallowed.
I left. I told him we’d talk later and I meant it.
Then I just... didn’t follow up.
The thought made something twist uncomfortably inside her.
Because part of me was scared of what talking about it would actually mean.
That was the part she hadn’t wanted to admit.
She had kissed him and it was not accidentally.
Not because she’d been confused about what she was doing.
She had wanted to.
Then she’d gotten scared of what wanting it meant.
Sarah passed the same porch light that had been flickering for a month.
She glanced at it briefly and thought, absurdly, that Jason would probably have something dry to say about it if he were walking beside her right now.
Something about the light having commitment issues.
Or perhaps a comment about how the landlord had apparently decided darkness was a perfectly acceptable maintenance strategy.
The thought almost made her smile.
Almost.
Tonight I’m walking toward him because something bad happened.
And running the other way isn’t even a version of tonight that exists for me.
That thought settled something inside her.
She didn’t know exactly what she was going to say when she saw him.
She didn’t know whether he’d be angry. She didn’t know whether he’d even want to talk to her.
But she knew she had to show up. That was the important part.
Sarah reached his building and climbed the front steps quickly. This time, she didn’t hesitate and she buzzed in without hesitation.
No ninety seconds of standing outside while deciding whether to use her keys. No elaborate lie rehearsed in advance.
No carefully constructed excuse that would give her the option of leaving if things became uncomfortable.
Just the plain, simple momentum of a person who already knew exactly why she was here.
The door clicked open.
Sarah stepped inside.
The familiar warmth of the building immediately replaced the cold night air.
What am I even going to say?
She hadn’t actually planned that part.
She’d been so focused on getting here that the actual words hadn’t organized themselves into anything useful.
She could apologize. That seemed obvious.
But apologize for what? For what Priya had said? For not being there?For leaving Jason hanging after the kiss?
She could already imagine the conversation becoming tangled in ways neither of them intended.
Maybe she’d say too much. Maybe she’d say too little.
Maybe Jason would look at her with that quiet expression of his and somehow make her feel like he’d already figured out everything she was trying not to say.
I’ll figure it out when I see his face.
That felt truer than anything she could have rehearsed in an elevator anyway.
She walked down the familiar hallway.
Her footsteps were quieter than they’d been on the street. Some instinct told her to slow down now that she was actually close.
The last twenty feet deserved more care than the mile that had come before them.
She reached his door and stopped.
His door, the same one she’d walked out of less than twenty-four hours ago.
She could still remember standing there hand on the handle.
Deciding whether to stay or go.
Except now the decision had already been made somewhere back on Amanda’s street corner.
All that remained was the actual doing of it.
Sarah stared at the door and raised her hand then hesitated for exactly one second.
She listened. Nothing. No television playing. No footsteps.
No movement she could make out through the door.
Her stomach tightened.
Is he even okay in there?
The thought came immediately after.
Is he sitting in the dark right now, replaying it the way I know he would?
She imagined him sitting somewhere alone.
Maybe on his bed.
Maybe on the couch.
Probably telling himself that the entire situation didn’t matter.
Probably doing everything possible to reduce the night into a series of facts so he wouldn’t have to actually feel it.
Sarah took one slow breath and then another. Her hand finally moved.
She knocked.
Visit and read more novel to help us update chapter quickly. Thank you so much!
Use arrow keys (or A / D) to PREV/NEXT chapter