Livestream Matchmaking: My Intel Infinitely Refreshes
Chapter 29: Late-Night Emotional SessionChapter 29: Chapter 29: Late-Night Emotional Session
Hearing that Zhang Zhe had made progress with his matchmaking, his parents’ eyes lit up at the same time.
Mrs. Zhang immediately jumped in, "Why are you telling your dad? He doesn’t even care about you going on blind dates. I asked him to help me ask your old classmates, and he wouldn’t even do that."
"Just tell me. I’m your real ally here."
"You? An ally? I’d be happy if you just didn’t cause more trouble." Zhang Zhe really wanted to roll his eyes. "Mom, hurry and tell Zhou Ya that I’m heading back to Shencheng City for work, so the blind date is off."
"Don’t let people get the wrong idea. My old high school classmates will think I’ve been simping for this girl for over a decade. The moment you step outside, people will point at you and say, ’There goes the simp’s mom.’"
"HAHAHAHA..." Father Zhang, who was standing nearby, couldn’t help but burst out laughing. Naturally, he earned a vicious glare for his trouble.
"Alright, fine. I hadn’t actually asked her out yet, just added her as a contact," Mrs. Zhang said, a bit sullenly. "I’ll just keep her on my list then. The day you get married, I’ll contact her and make sure she comes to pay up."
"I remember you went and gave a gift at her wedding."
"Fine, fine, whatever." Zhang Zhe didn’t want to discuss the topic anymore.
He still wanted to tell his parents the real good news: that he’d found a part-time job at the marriage agency.
Hearing that he’d become a streamer at the marriage agency, Mrs. Zhang was the first to voice her doubts. "You can be a streamer with your looks? You’re not going to be some kind of comedy act, are you?"
Father Zhang, however, expressed his disapproval of Zhang Zhe working without pay. "How can you not ask for a salary? They should at least give you enough for food, shouldn’t they?"
Zhang Zhe ignored his mother’s insulting skepticism.
Instead, he ran the numbers for Father Zhang.
The best product at the Zhuyin Marriage Agency is the "Two-on-One Customized Matchmaking Service." Two Matchmakers work in shifts, available seven days a week to help find a partner. They guarantee at least one blind date per day and provide relationship advice based on the results.
The service is priced at 48,888 a month.
It was a service almost exclusively for the super-rich.
"Mom, would you be willing to spend the money to buy this service for me?" Zhang Zhe asked, staring at his mother.
She hesitated for a moment. "How about you tell me which other old classmate you like, and I’ll go ask if they’re divorced yet?"
"See? Even someone as generous as you won’t shell out that kind of cash for me. But by working there part-time, I get to use a service like this for free."
"All the Matchmakers in the company group chat are giving me ideas."
"In the livestream, I can go on more than ten blind dates every day, all while getting continuous exposure on the internet."
"If I still can’t find a wife even after all this..."
"...Then it’s really just fate!" Mrs. Zhang finished his sentence. "Son, after hearing all that, I feel like you should be paying the marriage agency to work there."
"That’s not necessary. If I run the company’s Douyin account well, I’m already doing Boss He a huge favor."
After hearing Zhang Zhe’s analysis, his parents no longer had any doubts.
Now, they just had to wait and see how things played out. Let Zhang Zhe stream for a while, and if they were lucky, they could be holding a grandchild by next year.
...
After dinner, Zhang Zhe returned to his bedroom and spent three hours editing clips from his stream earlier that day.
In order to climb higher on the "Earth Ranking," he focused his edits on the moments when several of the women from his blind dates lost their composure.
Without exception, all of them had lost their composure because Zhang Zhe told them the truth.
Well, that couldn’t be helped. Zhang Zhe felt he had nothing to reflect on and nothing to improve. If a Matchmaker started telling lies, they could just wait for their reputation to go down the drain.
A little after 10 PM, Zhang Zhe was about to go to sleep.
On the marriage agency’s official Douyin account, he suddenly received a direct message:
"Matchmaker, can I ask you a question? I can pay. I’m feeling really lost right now and don’t know if I should even get married anymore. I hope you can reply when you have a moment. I need someone to chew me out and snap me out of it..."
Zhang Zhe knew just from the message that this person was getting emo late at night. ’They probably spent too much time scrolling social media or listening to one of those depressing music apps and started losing the will to live.’
’This is pretty normal,’ he figured. ’Feeling down late at night is a physiological reaction. The mix of hormone levels at night just makes people more susceptible to feeling low.’
Zhang Zhe hadn’t planned on replying to them.
They were asking to be chewed out, which was a pretty rare request. ’Some troll with too much time on their hands would probably jump at the chance to get on a call and yell at them,’ he thought.
Zhang Zhe didn’t have that kind of time. He still had to cram the materials Boss He had sent him, study the theoretical knowledge of matchmaking, and arm himself with a wealth of information.
He simply didn’t have the time or inclination for an emotional tirade.
"Don’t overthink things at night. Just get some sleep," Zhang Zhe replied simply.
To his surprise, they replied instantly, as if they’d been staring at their phone. "Ah! Matchmaker, you’re online! Can you talk to me? I’m a woman. I can have a blind date with you, and I can introduce you to my friends, too! I have five close girlfriends."
Zhang Zhe blinked. Suddenly, he wasn’t in such a hurry to turn off his phone anymore.
’Five friends, plus her... that’s at least six points.’
Even for a man of principle like Zhang Zhe, this was reason enough to give her the wake-up call she wanted.
"Your friends are truly blessed to have you."
"Okay, I’m going live now. Come and join the call."
...
Zhang Zhe did some quick tidying. His bedroom was actually a bit messy, but luckily, the curtains on his balcony were clean and could serve as a backdrop.
He propped up his phone, put on his wired earbuds, and figured it would be fine to stream for a little while as long as he wasn’t too loud and didn’t disturb the neighbors.
[Qing City Zhuyin Marriage Agency is now live!]
Many fans who were lying in bed scrolling through Douyin saw the notification and thought they were seeing things.
’A livestream at almost 11 PM?’
’The marriage agency is still doing matchmaking at this hour?’
’Are they trying to find a partner for Nie Xiaoqian?’
Skeptical, many people decided to click into the stream to see what was going on. The moment they entered, they were greeted by Zhang Zhe’s handsome face, which bore a striking resemblance to a young Pan Wei Bai.
’The beauty filters on Douyin Live are just too powerful.’
Staring at his own face on the screen, Zhang Zhe felt that if he really looked this good, he could probably become a civil servant even if he couldn’t read.
[Is the streamer trying to push the envelope this late at night?]
[Late-night relationship advice stream?]
[Who are you streaming for this late, ghosts?]
[Is this a new streamer for the marriage agency? He looks like he knows how to put on a show.]
"Tonight is indeed a relationship advice stream." Zhang Zhe nodded at the camera. "I know people tend to get emo at night. I also know that for many working folks, this is the only time of day that’s really their own."
"That’s why I’ve specifically chosen to go live at this time."
"I’m giving you all a chance. Anyone who wants a blind date, step up now. If no one comes, I’m ending the stream."
Looking at the 200-plus viewers in the chat, Zhang Zhe said he’d end the stream with complete confidence.
Because the girl who had DMed him was already requesting to join the call.
"Oh, look at that! Someone’s already joining the call."
"Alright, let’s bring them on. Welcome!"
"Hello? Can you hear me?"
"Good evening, streamer," the person on the other end said, turning on her camera.
The girl who joined the call had a classic oval-shaped face, but with very little excess fat and no baby fat, giving her a very sharp and capable look.
Zhang Zhe hadn’t expected her to turn on her camera, especially this late at night.
’Most women take their makeup off by this time,’ he mused. ’And plenty of them think their made-up face is their true self, so they refuse to appear on camera at night.’
’This one was an exception. She was completely bare-faced and looked pretty fresh. Her looks were only about a 4 out of 10, but that confidence alone was worth an extra half-point.’
"Thank you, streamer, for being willing to talk with me this late."
"It’s no problem. Just remember what you promised me."
[???]
[I smell an under-the-table deal.]
[Don’t do it, girl! This Matchmaker is definitely trying to mess with you!]
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