QT: I hijacked a harem system and now I'm ruining every plot(GL)

Chapter 452: Seraphina

I try not to think about it, but the images are in my mind.

I try not to compare.

I try not to wonder why I do not have that.

I have four mates.

Four Alphas.

Four powerful, handsome, devoted wolves.

And yet—

It is different. The way they are with me. And the way Elara was with her mate. I hate it. Of course Elara gets a mate like that. Why does everything go to her?

Born into the best family. Having a family. Being effortlessly loved. Why would her mate be anything but perfect?

I sit on the edge of the bed. The room is quiet. The house is quiet. My mates are somewhere else, doing something else, being themselves.

I stand and go to the bathroom. I did not want to take a shower—to wash out all the seed inside me. At least one of them should conceive. I look at my face in the mirror.

My hair is wild. My face looks back at me. Apparently, I am beautiful. It is the only thing I have—my beautiful face. It is thanks to this face that four aggressive Alphas easily tolerated the fact that they had to share a mate.

I wish I could go back to the early days, when they would all fight for my attention and worship me.

The physical attraction is still there. They will always have that aspect between mates. But in other aspects,not sexual...our relationship has stalled.

I hold my stomach and sincerely hope for another child.

I do not understand why I am suffering like this.

I am the chosen Omega wolf. The one to unite the packs in the fight against the vampires. I am the star. The goddess’s favorite.

I should not be feeling like this.

I grip the edges of the sink. My knuckles are white.

I look at my reflection. It looks back at me.

I am beautiful. I am the chosen one. I am Luna of all four packs.

I am the reason the wolves fought back and we won against the vampires.

Me.

All wolves on these grounds owe me.

I should be happy. I should be the happiest.

Not Elara!

I stare at my reflection. My eyes are wild. My hair is tangled. My chest is heaving.

I am Luna.

I am the chosen one.

I am the one who united the packs.

I am the one who led them against the vampires.

I should be happy. I should be the happiest.

Not Elara!

I stare at my reflection. My eyes are wild. My hair is tangled. My chest is heaving.

I am Luna. I am the chosen one.

The wolves were stuck in their petty squabbles and politics while the vampires were finishing us one by one. So many wolves died. I am the reason we had a fighting chance.

Everyone seems to have forgotten that fact.

I remember the blood. I remember the bodies of wolves who fell beside me. I remember the fear in their eyes. I remember the hope in their voices when they looked at me.

Now they whisper about me.

If only my son looked more like me than Marcus. I wish he did not look like Marcus at all.

Ethan has his father’s blonde hair. His father’s blue eyes. His father’s stubborn jaw. Every time I look at him, I see Marcus. Everyone can see that.

So I understand why the others want their own children.

But I cannot get fucking pregnant!

I slam my fist against the sink. The impact jars my arm, but I do not care. The pain is good. It is real.

I do not understand.

I am an Omega. I should be fertile. I should be able to carry children easily.

But my body refuses.

I have done everything right. I have followed the rituals. I have prayed to the goddess. I have let them take me whenever they wanted. I have done everything I was supposed to do.

*

I decide to go for a run instead. My white fur is very noticeable, but during a bright afternoon like today, at least it is not as jarringly obvious.

I shift. My bones crack. My skin ripples. White fur sprouts across my body. I am lighter now—freer, in a way I cannot be in human form.

I run.

The forest blurs past me. The wind rushes through my fur. The sun is warm on my back.

I accidentally find myself where there is a pair of young female wolves.

"I cannot believe you did that."

Giggles.

I stop. I hide under bushes, not wanting to be seen.

"I did not do anything bad."

"You were acting friendly with one of the Luna’s mates."

"Firstly, he did not push me away."

"That is because Alpha Rylan is a good, friendly Alpha."

"Secondly, it was harmless. Besides, I always thought I would mate with him when I became an adult."

"Still, he is mated."

"Oh please, the Luna would not notice."

"There is no mated she-wolf that would be calm."

"She has got so many mates to think about. Besides, we all know she has a favorite. She gave him a pup."

"Hush! Do not say that!"

"What? It is true. Had she really thought of all of them the same, with such virile Alphas, she would have been popping out pups left and right. I know I would, if I had Alpha Rylan. We would repopulate the Stoneclaw Pack just the two of us."

Giggles.

I fight the urge to go and rip out the throat of that wolf. But I still sit here until they are long gone from my sight.

I step out from the bushes. My fur is bristling. My heart is pounding.I stare at the empty space where they were.

How dare they?

Are all the wolves mocking me like this?

Am I a joke to them?

I shift back to human form. My hands are shaking. My breath is shallow. I tried to go for a run to clear my mind but it just made matters worse.

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